Wednesday, 26 October 2011

Christmas BEFORE Halloween? Seriously?

Has this world gone insane? It's bad enough when people have to deal with the holiday rush from the day after Thanksgiving until midnight Christmas Eve, but I began seeing decorations last week alongside the Halloween stuff! The TV stations are already running holiday commercials such as Christmas lay-a-way at Walmart and K-Mart

I don’t want to see anything even remotely related to Christmas until maybe mid-November. Sure, I’ve always been known as a Mrs. Scrooge in the sense that I just don’t like the holiday, but I’m getting better about it. Mellowing out. Since moving into this new house, we were able to have room for a real tree and to put up decorations. I enjoyed last year’s Christmas for the first time since I was a kid.

But for crying out loud, retailers need to let shoppers get over the candy-induced hangover of Halloween before slapping them in the face with Christmas lay-a-way ads and more.

My biggest peeves with Christmas boils down to three things.

A) Christmas should be about caring for one another and not having to buy or make a damn present for everyone from your significant other to Aunt Gertrude’s gerbil.
B) People turn into jackasses during the holiday season. It irks me to no end. Why? Refer to point A.
C) And lastly, I hate, hate, hate going out into the herd of jackasses. Why? Refer to point B.

Granted not everyone turns into raving lunatics, but it sure seems like most do. And talk about rude! Christmas time makes food stamp and SSI day at Walmart look like a church picnic.

As a result, most of my Christmas shopping is done online. And I make a lot of my gifts too. This year, however, there will be lots of goodie boxes full of fudge—chocolate, pb, cherry, spiced, mint, banana, etc.—cookies, fudgie cakes and melt-in-mouth holiday treats. With all the writing and deadlines I’ve had this year, no crocheted hats, blankets, etc. will be wrapped up. (sigh) I’ve missed that because it helps calm me when I’m stressed.

Anyway, I don’t want to see commercials about a sale on green-and-red Christmas cookies at Kroger’s because by the time I’d fight my way through the riots there’d be nothing left ‘cept some colored sugar crystals. And I don’t give a rat’s ass about a sale on dolls that poop their pants in Technicolor brilliance at Walmart. With this economy no one can afford to buy much anyway. It’s all some folks can do to keep food on the table and gas in their vehicles, yanno?

Besides, if someone wants such a doll, I can loan ‘em my grandson after he’s ate too many fruit snacks. BOOM! Now *that’s* a brilliant, Technicolor diapie.

Oh, here’s another thing that irks me about too-soon Christmas displays and ads: wrapping paper. What’s the point of even buying the damn stuff? If you even breathe on a sheet of it there’s a gaping hole staring back at you—and you pay upwards of $8 to $10 a roll for the good stuff! The catch? Less paper because it’s the stuff that actually wraps something.

“Here, honey. Take this brown shipping paper and crayons and doodle Christmas stuff. Mommy needs some wrapping paper.”

Gah.

No, keep the Christmas stuff out of my sight unto mid-November. Oh, and here’s a suggestion I should stuff in every store’s suggestion box: don’t start playing Bing Crosby’s White Christmas until after Thanksgiving. Hearing it while I’m buying last-minute Halloween candy creates nervous ticks that are often irreversible.

On another note, visit me over at Ramblings of A Chaotic Mind. Here’s the link http://bit.ly/rOJK6T and make sure you scroll all the way to the bottom so you don't miss the entire post.

17 comments:

trinity said...

Oh my god laughed so hard! See I hate the drunks. I don't know what it is, but it seems everyone is now getting drunk on this holiday. EXCUSE ME but I want to enjoy with my family not have bunch of drunk assholes around. SO this year, just close family! Sorry no in-laws this year. I'll be damn if I have my brother in law pawing at me all night long!
Trinity

Faith said...

I haven't been to a Christmas party in years, Trin. Just about the only thing we really do to celebrate the holiday is go to the Christmas Eve Candlelight Services.

Janie Emaus said...

Yep.. Way too soon. It's still like summer in So Cal!

Faith said...

I once spent Christmas in Florida and the Keys, Janie. Although there were decorations everywhere, it still didn't feel like Christmas with the sunshine and warm temps.

Jamie said...

I completely agree. Every year Christmas shows up earlier and earlier. It was bad enough when I worked in retail. If it weren't for my son, I wouldn't have a tree or even think about decorating (which typically doesn't get until two days before anyway and comes down as quickly as possible after).

Faith said...

I don't mind putting up the Christmas stuff. It's taking it all down and putting it away that I hate.

Cassie Exline said...

It sure does seem like Christmas comes earlier and earlier. Before Halloween seems a bit much. Ho! Ho! Ho!

Valerie Mann said...

right there with you on the holiday thing, Faith! Amazon.com is my best friend and the UPS man and I exchange email addresses since we are so chummy. Not kidding on the Amazon thing...kidding on the UPS guy thing. Although my husband SWEARS that our youngest looks like the UPS man.

Faith said...

HAHA! My dad used to tease me that I was the milkman's daughter because he used to work as a milkman when they still delivered the glass bottles to people's doorsteps.

Although there is a UPS man in our area who is nice looking with a killer Australian accent. Always enjoy the eyecandy when it's Christmas time, lmao.

Jaime Samms said...

Amen! And I'm not even the praying sort!

Denise Patrick said...

Very funny, Faith. But, I'll go you one further. I like to celebrate my holidays one at a time! I don't want to hear Christmas songs, or see Christmas stuff until after Thanksgiving. A few years ago I stopped listening to my favorite radio station because they started playing Christmas songs on November 1 - seriously! And, any radio station that plays Christmas songs before Thanksgiving goes on my list. I'm not a Scrooge - I love Christmas, but I also like Thanksgiving, Halloween, Veteran's Day, etc. Just one at a time, please!

E. Ayers said...

I almost died laughing over the milkman's daughter. My mom's best friend's children all belonged to the milkman. Yes, they had a dairy farm and he delivered the milk.

Now as for Christmas - OMG! Last year I needed something for the big Thanksgiving bash and I figured I could run out and get a few decorative items. Nope! Everything was Christmas. I couldn't find a yellow or orange napkin much less a few silk mums. Seems I must buy them in August because by the end of August everything is switching to Christmas. I understand Christmas has caught on in China too.

Faith said...

I have to agree with you, Denise. There's a radio station here that does the same thing, and our old satellite provider put up a Christmas station on sat radio on Nov. 1 too. I always felt so odd hearing The Little Drummer Boy immediately after Halloween.

E. Ayers, I've had the same problem a few times. It certainly does seem like one must buy things two months ahead of time to make sure there's enough.

Anthology Authors said...

I saw Christmas decorations up and available at Costco in August. Yeah, I know. I like Christmas, but I kind of want that crispness in the air before I start seeing the stuff for it.

Faith said...

In August, Marci? Holy crap! And I thought September was bad!

Adelle Laudan said...

I HATE Christmas SHOPPING! I have zero tolerance for rude people and they are coming out of the woodwork at Christmas time. I'm loving the online shopping, and the fact my girls love getting money lol Easy to wrap that *wink

Faith said...

Actually, I prefer online shopping year round. I'd get all my groceries delivered too if it wasn't for the high shipping fees and the fact that perishables can't be shipped here.

I have grandchildren now. Two so far with two more on the way. And two kids under my roof to still buy for. Can I cry now?