Thursday 4 November 2010

You Write What...?




Lots to write about today, my beauties, so let’s get started!

First, I’ll address my main topic: reactions from real-life people when they find out what I write. Okay, I’ll agree that to the average person, finding out someone you know writes erotica could be a little startling. To me it’s normal. I’m surrounded all day, albeit online, by people who write the same thing. It’s our “thing”, what we do, and no one online questions it or bats an eyelid. Real-life people are entirely different animals.

When I used to write solely horror, people recoiled in shock that me, this “normal” woman who jokes about and acts the fool, writes, and ENJOYS writing, about severing people’s heads off, among other ghastly things. I got weird looks, people stepping back and suddenly finding they had someplace else to go, and avoiding me thereafter. Erotica is no different, except the reactions are a little more…horrified.

I can tell by their expressions—and they literally play out on their faces by differing degrees—that they suspect I am:

1, a sex-craving beast

2, that I type one handed, if you catch my drift

3, that I’ll possibly try and steal their husband—after all, if I write sex, I must be gagging for it, and my husband couldn’t possibly keep up with my demands

4, I’m a weirdo

Now, I get where they’re coming from. Most people don’t understand the world of writing and that just because you write something, it doesn’t necessarily mean it is a reflection of you as a person or who you ARE. I’m not a sex-craving beast, my poor husband will attest to that. I don’t type one-handed or get turned on in any way while writing sex scenes—I’m too interested in making sure their body parts are in the correct places, that I’m not repeating the usual words that crop up for me in sex scenes (pushed, pulled, up and down, against) and generally making sure, when writing m/m, that my pronouns are clear. I do not wish to steal anyone’s husband. I have a perfectly adorable one of my own, thank you, and I love him with every single bit of me. And, okay, I’ll give you this one, I’m a weirdo at times, but not in the manner where they undoubtedly think I’m a sexual deviant.

Thankfully, there are others who are intrigued, and my neighbours, friends, and family, the ones who know anyway hahaha, think nothing of it except it just being what I do. I’m me, to them. The same as I’ve always been.

So, that’s the real-life female reaction for you as I have experienced it. The male…haven’t really encountered any reactions there other than from family members. Dad shrugged it off as “just something I write”, and if it makes me happy, then it’s worth doing. My brother cracked the hell up when I told him but like Dad has the “shrug” attitude of “So what?” My sons think nothing of it. With regards to manlove, they know my stance anyway. Love is love, whoever is doing the loving. Mum writes books about men in love, men and women in love, and also books about stabbing the life out of someone. No biggie. They could have turned out demented, actually, now that I think about the stabbing bit, but they know it’s fiction, for God’s sake.

The online reaction from a couple of men has been…different. Now, for those who know me, I do NOT do perverts. I don’t tolerate any crude remarks in emails, no on-the-sly flirting, and I most certainly do NOT appreciate the men who treated me differently once they found out I write erotica. I met these men when I was an editor—still am an editor at heart but only for friends now—and when I “just” wrote horror, everything went along swimmingly (there’s a good old Brit bit of language for you). But upon finding out what else I wrote… Well, let’s just say, even though the comments were harmless, I felt sick, violated, and got the damn creeps.

Just because I write about it, it doesn’t mean it’s going to seep into emails, thankyouverymuch. I’m not going to talk dirty to anyone unless it’s in my damn books. Jesus, I don’t even talk dirty to my husband, ffs! It doesn’t mean I’ve done all the things my heroine did in the book. Doesn’t mean I feel the same as her. She’s HER, I’m just the bloody author, know what I mean?

On another note, there are men who are sensible. They understand the deal and have never treated me differently.

Again, as with my other two posts here this week, unanimous ARGH, my loves? A really loud one? With fists bunched, and maybe a good old headbutt to the desk? Yes, it feels mighty grand to nut the desk, doesn’t it?

So, for the first part of my post, tell me all about your experiences with reactions. Let it allll out, then breeeeeeeeeeeathe a sigh of relief that you’ve released the tension you’ve been so longing to expel.


Experiment based on yesterday’s snobbery post


This morning I had the rather crafty idea of testing the public on me wearing something entirely different to my usual clothing, which is jeans or jogging bottoms—and, according to the snobby buggers, the jogging bottoms are “exercise attire” and I have had one woman mention that I must enjoy the gym three times per week because that’s how often I wear my exercise attire.

Uh, yeah. Whatever you think, love.

Anyway, today I donned a skirt, knee-high boots, a black fitted sweater, a dark denim jacket, and a black chiffon scarf. I also put make-up on, and just for the record, my clothes were all cheap. First comment occurred before I’d even left the house. My smallest: Oh, you’re wearing a skirt for once. Second comment as I stepped out of the house. Neighbour: Oooh, you’ve got a skirt on. To which I replied: Stop it! This is why I don’t wear them because people comment!

I’ve had this conversation with my neighbour, Kirsty, before. We tend to wear “safe” clothing, where we blend into the crowd, because when we do wear something different, people tend to comment as though it can’t be possible that we even OWN a bloody skirt. And worse, we’ve both had this said to us: Oh, going somewhere nice today then?

Like we need a damn occasion to “dress up”? GRR.

The idea of this experiment was to see if the snobs viewed me differently, but there was one twist, and I’ll reveal that in a bit. I’m warped sometimes, so I found the twist hilarious, but that’s just me. So, here are the results. I got an up-and-down look from a man. Totally unappreciated, dude. You gave me the creeps and made me ask myself whether I had “I love perverts!” written on my forehead. A few eyes-wide looks from women. Thanks, loves. Learn to hide your reactions better next time. And, get this, even an eyes-wide, jerk-his-head-back look from a little boy! Evidently, he’s so used to seeing me in my exercise attire, that seeing me in a skirt shit the life out of him.

But the last woman, who literally lifted her nose in the air and studied me from half-closed eyes—what the eff was THAT all about, eh?—gave me the urge to laugh in her face once she’d looked, decided I’d “pass” as someone she could smile at, which she did, because I thought: I wonder if you’d be so quick to smile knowing that beneath my boots I’m wearing a pair of my husband’s old “exercise attire” socks, complete with hole in the toe, said hole strangling said toe, and toe currently chafing painfully against the inside of my boot?

So, clothing DOES make people see you differently, and, quite honestly, that sucks hairy dog’s balls.


Totally random subject


Also, and I have no clue whether anyone would give a shit about this, I have a groovy tip to share. Lately, I don’t think my washing machine has been fully draining out the water on the last spin, because a rather distasteful smell has emanated from the drum if I’ve gone a day without doing laundry. Yes, that does happen on occasion, and I curse myself for it because with 6 people living here the washing mounts up PDQ.

Those who know about my tips in the online AWH magazine I used to do will know my utter adoration of the fabulous substance that is bicarbonate of soda. It’s excellent for adding to water for a number of cleaning issues, smells in particular. So today I decided to run a rinse cycle through my empty machine using this gorgeous powdery substance, and viola! That nasty smell has gone.

So there you have it. I stand firm in my belief that if you have a smell you can’t get rid of, wash it with bicarb in hot water. Sadly, this doesn’t work for bodily gas.

Have a fantastic day, folks!

62 comments:

Faith Bicknell said...

Oh! Since I've been up at the butt crack of dawn today, I get to be the first one to comment, so...

"Mum writes books about men in love, men and women in love, and also books about stabbing the life out of someone. No biggie."

ROTFLMAO!!!!! That bit above gave me my first laugh of the day!

Emmy Ellis said...

HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAA!

It's just so "normal" to them, though.

Giggling here.

:o)

Tess MacKall said...

Yep, we're all one-handed-typing-husband-stealing hussies for sure.

And I've long dealt with the dudes who see erotic romance writer in my profile and think---"easy pickings'". Yeah, right. Like I'd give some dude on a social network site a second thought. Especially when he messages me and tells me all about his sexual stamina or emails me a pic of him measure his cock. Screw that---well, actually don't screw that. But you know what I mean.

As for your snobby ladies? I get that too. I am always too damn busy to dress up to go into school. I'm usually rushing in and out. I remember showing up at graduation dressed to the nines and got comments like: "you looked so good I didn't recognize you." Yeah, they said that. LMAO

What a left-handed compliment. And I really wanted to say back to them---on my worst day I still outshine you--you moley-faced, stringy-haired, tight-lipped, biotches!!!!!

I don't have time for games with these people. And quite frankly, my mind and its thought processes and abilities far exceed any thing that bunch could produce. All they think about is fashion and one upping. Screw that. I'm a much deeper person. I don't care what kind of clothes they wear, don't care what kind of car they drive, don't care where they had dinner last night.

I only care that my kid is a good kid and feels loved and wanted and valued--and their kid is running around with his/her nose up in the air judging his/her peers and having sex already at age fourteen and smoking pot and taking pills. Yeah, that's what kids do when they can't seem Mom and Dad caring about anything but money. Screw 'em. Okay, rant over.

Emmy Ellis said...

OMG!!!!!!!!!!! LOL lots, Tess? My God, I laughed so loudly at your comment I scared my damn self.

On a serious note, though, I know what you mean. I stand there and think: You have no idea how much I know, that despite me seeming this nutty cow, I'm actually quite clever.

I don't want to come across as big-headed here, by the way, just sayin', gassing with the gals and all that. What's in my mind, all that knowledge from research and whatnot... And also, when they're talking to me, with no clue that I've studied some aspects of psychology, I can read exactly what they AREN'T saying and know what kind of person they are.

I picked up on something at the school yesterday actually, and I must ask the person it involves whether she'd mind me blogging about it, that instantly showed me, just by what this woman did, what kind of person she is and that she displayed all her insecurities right there by one gesture. Amazing.

But that's another topic entirely, one I'll write about if the woman doesn't mind, because it wasn't the woman herself who I guessed stuff from, but someone she knows.

Gosh. I need to shut up, really, otherwise I'll be waffling in this comment all day.

C. Zampa said...

LOL at the one-handed typing. You're so right..if only people knew it wasn't so easy to write sex! And it takes too much concentration to get turn on while writing it! LOL.

Down here in southeast Texas, we must be immune to sex and shock. Nobody raises a brow when they find out I write erotica, even when they know I write m/m. And, hey, sometimes I WANT to raise brows!

And, yes, people sure can be snobs about clothing. Which I loved when I read that the late Sam Walton drove an older model pick up truck and dressed in his khaki one-piece work outfits all the time. Many probably looked down on him as a simple farmer or something, surely unaware they were turning their noses up at a billionare! LOL.
Just goes to show, though...you just never know who's under the everyday clothes!

Anonymous said...

I actually don't tell ANYONE what I write. It would kill my family, LOL. And in the area I live in, women don't even talk about sex, much less write about it. It's kind of sad, because I would like to be able to brag, share the excitement of release day, etc, but I can't. Only my husband knows what I write and he's not much interested in it.

But then I guess the upside is that I avoid those reactions you talked about...

Emmy Ellis said...

Hiya CZ!

Oooh, I like your thoughts on that guy and what he wears. Brings to mind this TV programme here where millionaires who look "normal" (whatever that is!) visit everyday people and then reveal at the end of the week they're loaded. They hand a cheque over too, helping them out of hard times. Can't think what the hell it's called now, but it's cool.

LOL @ you wanting to raise brows, you nutter. Elegant nutter at that.

:o)

Emmy Ellis said...

Awww, Annabell. I can't imagine you having to keep all that excitement inside on release days. That's made me feel quite sad. God, I hope it changes for you soon, though by the sounds of it, it doesn't sound like it will. Have a hug. {{HUG}}

:o(

Emmy Ellis said...

And pardon me, I spelled your name with two Ls. I hate it when I get names wrong like that. Sorry.

:o)

Faith Bicknell said...

I'm another one who can't say much in my community about what I write. I'm on the tail end of the Bible belt, lol.

Emmy Ellis said...

Blimey. Imagine telling people at the church that your characters enjoy a menage or two. Oh my goodness.

:o)

Tess MacKall said...

Oh yeah, Sarah, I'd love to be able to tell some of those people who look down on me for wearing my sweats and t shirts to the parent teacher conference that I once wore ball gowns and had my hair done once a week whether it needed it or not. lol I'd love to tell them just what I did for a living and how I left it all behind because it was NOT a good life---just an empty life with a big pocketbook. Nice in some ways but very lonely in others. I'll take my downsized pocket book and my three kids and all their issues over that other life any day.

Ain't life grand? (and I just had a thought--bet they'd think I didn't know better than to use the non-word "ain't" too) sighhhhhh

Faith Bicknell said...

::snort:: Exactly! My dad's a minister and he's fine with what I write because he knows it helps pay the bills, but others wouldn't be so understanding...

Emmy Ellis said...

Yep, Tess. They may look at us like we're nothing, but no one knows anyone else's past unless they're told, so for them to be judging us based on what we write or wear...eff 'em. Since writing my posts about it, I've realised I can't be arsed to even give them thinking space in my head.

Balls to them all.

:o)

Emmy Ellis said...

Indeed, Faith. Bloody small-minded buggers that they are.

:o)

Rhino said...

I can't stand people who judge all the time. I live in Southern West Virginia, and I write paranormal romance, but have decided to give erotica a go also.

When I revealed that I'd written a paranormal romance novel, it raised a few eyebrows and piqued a few interests. As I've decided to try erotica writing, I'm suddenly a one handed typer, a husband thief, and all those other lovely things that were mentioned in the post!

The thing is, I have always been an outcast here, and I'm used to it. I raise my kids a little differently (meaning, I teach them to value people for who they are and not what they drive, wear, etc.) and I make no apologies for being me. If someone doesn't like me, that's fine. They don't have to be my friend!

My real friends love that I write what I write. They are the biggest support system I've even witnessed. All the others, those ladies with the fat wallets (and normally dissatisfied husbands to boot) and the expensive cars who always look like a million bucks at the PTA meetings...well they can all kiss my romance writing and reading rear. Who pays them to think anyhow?

Anonymous said...

It's sheer envy. ladies. They just wish they could be as talented, smart, and sexy and honest as you all instead of living double lives where they drown their desires in gin and jilling off to Internet porn.

Jaime Samms said...

I still haven't 'come out' to my family about what I write. They know I write, and they know I make actual cash dollars (however few) at it, but I have not made it clear exactly what I write. I am not up for the stress of telling them I write stories in which men do each other up the a**. I'm pretty sure at least some of them know my pen name and if they really want to know, they can go look it up and at least my little brother already has. He doesn't seem to care to mention it, so I'm guessing it doesn't make a difference to him. He friended my author FB page, so there you go.

As for people out in the world, mothers of my kids' friends, well, I'm hesitant to make an issue of it. Let's face it, home schooled kids have few enough opportunities to meet and befriend other kids. I'm not going to muck about with those friendships on the chance their parents are less open minded than I might like, right?

Regina Carlysle said...

Gonna comment about the snobbery stuff first because I just remembered a story. Back in the early 80's there was TONS of oil money in Texas. Millionaires around every corner in those days. Everyone was concerned with how they dressed and what 'labels' they wore. Very snotty times. My mom said she was in a high end jewelry store. Probably getting a watch battery or something cleaned. She said an elderly man came in wearing overalls and looking like he'd just come in from the fields. His wife was with him. She was dressed humbly. Not at all fashionable but looking rather work-worn. Mom was appalled when the staff seemed to just ignore the old couple. Blowing them off totally. Eventually someone walked up and the fella pointed to his and hers diamond encrusted Rolex watches. When the clerk pulled them out of the case, the old man said...I'll take em. He pulled out a roll of money and paid cash for both watches.

Regina Carlysle said...

As to telling others what I write? It's interesting because I'm in a very conservative town in west Texas. Very churchy and often judgmental about 'artsy types' of which I AM one. I tend to lay low and not go out much due to the nature of my work. Over the years, many have learned that I write romances. Most don't know that I've crossed over to the 'dark side' to write erotic. Back when I simply wrote hot romance, I was at a gathering and stood talking with several woman. We knew each other through our kids who were the same age. One of them asked me if I was still writing. I smiled and said Yes, I'm having lots of fun with it. Another woman piped up, kind of sticking her nose in the air and said...I never read trash. The other women gasped and I was simply stunned at her rudeness. I'm one of those people whose every emotion shows on her face. Don't hide things very well. I must have looked hurt because every single one of the other ladies began chatting about how they couldn't wait to read my work and began to name the romances they'd read or romance authors they loved. In the end, I have to say it was funny watching this woman rather back away and head off to terrorize someone else.

I also began to realize that people in my community weren't as judgmental as I'd believed. There is a serious "underground' of women here who know what I write and read everything I do and cheer me on. Usually I know who I can 'tell' about my job. The more educated and enlightened are fascinated. The rednecks? Nope. I'll never tell them. They'd just get the wrong idea about me.

Molly Daniels said...

OMG Reg...that reminds me of the day my SU left the jobsite; put his substantial, 80+ hour check in the bank, and went to buy a truck. He was on the high end of Indy, and the lone car salesman wouldn't go near him! Just figured someone wearing dirty coveralls couldn't possibly afford one of his used trucks.

He finally left, and ended up paying a friend CASH for his truck, which did last several years.

You just can't pre-judge people.

Emmy Ellis said...

Awww, Rhiannon. Those snooty folks are all over the damn world, I see. Thriving in their little worlds where they think we're husband-stealing-biotches.

Bless 'em.

:o)

Molly Daniels said...

As for what I write, I got the shock of my life last year. My mom objects heavily to my slight use of the F word in my two Molly books, so when Kenzie's came out, I confessed she wasn't going to like it and why.

Mom shrugged her shoulders. 'Sex sells.'

My jaw must have hit the floor.

She continued, 'I may not like what you write, but I'm proud of your writing ability/'

And last week, I was at a business meeting, and when the speaker found out I write romance, he patted my SU on the back and said something to the effect of enjoying the 'benefits':)

I was also given free wine at a Wine and Arts fair because I 'write smut':)

Emmy Ellis said...

LMAO a lot @ Lusha with the word "jilling". My friggin' belly hurts from laughing.

:o)

Emmy Ellis said...

Yep, Jaime. Prolly best to reamin quiet about it in your case. If it's for the kids' benefit, it's worth it.

:O)

Emmy Ellis said...

OMG Reg, that woman sounds an utter bitch. Trash...how rude? She's prolly a closet erotica reader and her reaction was her way of hiding that fact. Or something.

Aww, that old couple. Bless them.

:o)

Emmy Ellis said...

Ooooh, Molly. Glad he bought elsewhere!

:o)

Unknown said...

I really laughed reading this post. Exactly the same is happening to me now my book's published. 'What are people going to say?' I thought. But, now it's out, I really don't care and I'm pimping it to our locals like mad. Who cares what they think. Ummm...no I haven't shown it to my mother yet :-(
And as for dressing up - every year we go to a Christmas party where all the "ladies" look each other up and down and comment on their lovely clothes. That's why I've worn the same old dress for the last ten years! Well I like it - it's got pockets in it.

Marci Baun said...

Snobbery. Well, you should see how people respond when they see my hairy legs. (g) I walked into the kitchen this morning in a t-shirt and underwear. My DH said to me, "You need to shave your legs?" I looked at my legs. Yup, they're hairy. (g) I don't care. I long passed that point. When I attend a function where I know I need to dress fancy, I do. I live in LA. You can't get any more plastic than LA. Fortunately, most of the people I hang with don't care.

Being in LA, writing/publishing erotica doesn't seem to phase people. Heck, just over the hill in the Valley is the porn capitol of the world. Erotica is tame in comparison. (g) Oh, I know some erotica makes porn seem tame, but erotica is in your imagination. Porn is in your face. (g)

Marci Baun said...

Oh, I forgot to mention that my hairy legs never stopped me from getting hot men. HAHAHAHAHA

Shoshanna Evers said...

The best comment I got was when I introduced myself to a friend's husband and I said "Nice to meet you, I'm Shoshanna." And he goes "I know. My wife's learned about 15 new vocabulary words from your book. Um... thank you." LOL I just about died.

The worse comment was from my own brother, bless his heart. I started to tell him my exciting news about a Berkley Heat anthology, and he interrupts and says "I want to hear as LITTLE about this part of your life as possible." Grrrr (and sob).

But in general, people I tell just seem to think it's cool I write, and maybe they don't really care/notice it's erotica... although one woman did make a comment about how she thought erotica writers were "sexier" - um, yeah sorry I wear jeans and sweaters everywhere, I'm a mom.

Great post Natalie!

Unknown said...

What a wonderful post. I'm still laughing at typing one-handed. Sadly, when I go out and people look down their noses at me, it's usually because they wear bifocals. *lol*

While you are bemoaning the way people deal with you writing Erotica, I'd switch with you in a hot minute. I just tucked my new Medicare card into my wallet and am wondering how I went from 40 to Senior Citizen in the blink of an eye.

Loved your blog and am happy I found this site. Thanks to the person who posted it for sharing.

Emmy Ellis said...

Hi Sue! Much welcome hugs to you. I'm glad you had a laugh.

Aww @ not telling your mother yet! But BIG LOL @ wearing the dress because it has pockets!

:o)

Emmy Ellis said...

Marci, you have just given me my topic for tomorrow's post. Hairy legs. I'd already written tomorrow's about postmen, but that can wait until another time!

:o)

Emmy Ellis said...

LOL Shosh! Yes, I suspect they think we sit writing in expensive lingerie with bedroom toys on the desk beside the monitor. Oh my...

:o)

Emmy Ellis said...

Hi Ginger! A big welcome to you too. Glad to have you here.

Oh, age is but a number, my darlin'. Bi-focals and senior citizenship...pah! You're as young as you feel, so the saying goes!

:o)

Maeve Greyson said...

LMAO!!! "Sucks hair dog balls" I'm going to write that one down. As far as reactions to what I write? They range anywhere from "Oh - so you write THOSE smutty romance books with the naked men on the covers" to "OMG, where do you get your ideas" ?

If my husband is with me, he puffs out his chest and brags that all my material comes from him. *sigh* Poor deluded man. I just smile and go along. ;-)

Unknown said...

Loved the blog. Your commentary about people's reaction was spot on. I don't like to tell people in person what I write because they make me feel self conscious. And ask the stupidest questions lol.
As for typing one handed, isn't that how we get inspired? ;p

Emmy Ellis said...

Hahahahah, Maeve! Yeah, let the poor love have his delusions. VERY funny comment.

:o)

Emmy Ellis said...

LOL Eve! The thought of typing one handed just makes me shudder.

Shit, even THAT sounded plain wrong.

I'm with you on the stupid questions. When I admitted to someone I wrote m/m, she asked: So, what do they do?

I told her, didn't I, right down to the more "delicate" subjects I'd researched. I nearly said, "Shut your mouth, dear. You're catching flies."

Don't ask if you don't want to be told!

:o)

Anonymous said...

Great post! I just happened to stumble across a link to this and followed my curiosity.

You had me laughing so hard I thought I could catch my breath by reading some of the comments, but some of them kept me laughing, too.

No one knows what I write except my partner. My family would disown me and the couple of friends that I did tell, well, they have disowned me. It's difficult to keep good new inside, but thank goodness I have my partner. He's great.

Anyway, I have experienced guys sending me the dirty emails, pics of him nude, etc., expecting me to respond in kind.

Some people are so juvenile.

Emmy Ellis said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAH @ your hubby, Debs. I'm sure people think we're "at it" all the time. To be honest, I'm so tired after writing it, I'm hardly likely to want to DO it!

:O)

Emmy Ellis said...

Oh, Casey. I'd be bloody sick if I got rude pictures. Honestly, some people are just so...UGH!

Well, I'm glad you had a laugh. We need it at times, don't we? Keeps us sane and all that. And hey, if you need to shout out about your books, come here and guest blog. You're most welcome to. I hate the thought of you not being able to squeal about these things to people.

Disowning is such a strong thing to do, I feel. A shame they don't realise you are still you, no matter what you write.

:o)

anny cook said...

Ahem...I'm a senior citizen writing erotic romance. You should SEE some of the looks I get. My siblings know what I write (so they don't run out and pick up a book and die from shock--I'm too broke to go to the funerals). But my parents don't know what I write. And since my Dad's a retired minister in his 80's, I don't think now's the time to tell them.

As far as snobs...if you think hairy legs are bad, you should try on a full beard. I wax once a week and in between times, just live with it.

Emmy Ellis said...

HAHAHAHAHAH @ funeral comment.

Hey though, Anny. You could start a trend with that beard. What about adorning it with pretties? Little clips and things. Yes, I can see this catching on!

:o)

Anonymous said...

Thank you Sarah!
I will keep your offer to guest blog in mind next time I have something coming out.

=)

Emmy Ellis said...

Yay!

:o)

Marci Baun said...

Well, damn it, Emmy. There goes one of my weekly topics. LOL No worries. I'm working on something else. (g)

Marci Baun said...

Anny, I had a hairy grandmother. Guess which side of the family I take after? :-P

Emmy Ellis said...

You write about hairy legs too!

:O)

Brindle Chase said...

Being a male author of romance, and then erotic romance, I get a lot of mixed reactions.

Some assume I'm gay. Afterall, what straight guy (especially one who wears leather trenchcoats, has long hair to the mid of his back and is anything but a pretty boy), would want to write romance?

Then when they find out what kind, the spice level of my writing, the gay aura fades into sick pervert. I confess freely to being what some might deem perverse. I have a healthy respect for sex.. to some, that makes me a wretch. *shrugs*

The one handed typing image I'm sure mixes with the various assumptions of perversion noted above. Oddly, its not just people I meet. I get that vibe from time to time from other romance writers. Soon as they discover I'm male... the defenses come up and they distance themselves. Fortunately, those reactions are a minority.

My friends laugh, think its funny, but ultimately admire me for living my dream of writing professionally.

Kinda like Tess said, some women assume I'm open to perverted chat talk, because anyone who writes erotic romance, must be a sex hound. Right? I flirt some, because I've always been a flirt... can't help it, but it has nothing to do with my books. *lol*

Also, I've had several men hit on me, not realizing I was a guy, so I know Tess is on the nail there. Men assume erotic romance writers are the hussies of the romance novel world! *lol* I wouild love to be able to see their faces after they send me "adoring" letters and then stumble across my profile pic!! *lmfao*

Anywho... I write for the fun of it. I don't care much what others think of it.

Tess MacKall said...

okay, Brindle---where's the profile pic? I'm an inquiring mind and gotta get a look at the hair. lol

And you mean you're NOT gay? GASP! lol

God, what pre-conceived notions everyone has of us.

Back to my one-handed typing. LMAO

Natalie Dae said...

Hiya Brindle. I'm in the wrong account here, but it's Sarah.

Man, some people are just so odd. Who cares whether a male or female wrote the bloody book? Perceptions drive me insaaaaaaane!

Oh yeah, we're all one-handed typists, raging perverts, and whatever else they come up with.

ARGH!

I must get offline and write some more perverted stuff today, actually. Been a busy week, and I'm raring to get some wordcount down.

So, off to don my lingerie and apply thick make-up in order to do that.

HA!

:o)

Brindle Chase said...

*lol*@Tess... well, ok... but if seeing it gives you nightmares, I'm not to blame. I've been told I need to get some professional portraits done, but I figure its still too early in my wirting career to worry about pics, so for now, I just have one my daughter snapped of me holding Lucienne Diver's book, Vamped.

http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs141.snc4/36398_131113200253646_100000648996022_214278_5701075_n.jpg

*Nod*@Sarah... I hear that. A good book is a good book. But I think part of it, is when some find out it was written by a man, they get the creepy perv vibe, because it disturbs their reality, wherein men don't write romance. *lol* I dunno. Anywho, I don't let it stop me. I love writing it... so I do.

Brindle Chase said...

OK, that link was too long I guess. I sorry. That pic is up on my facebook and public, so just visit www.facebook.com/brindle.chase and click on the photo tab. There's also a pic of me on my about page on my web at www.forlorn-hope.net

Emmy Ellis said...

Brindle, let them think what they like, and you just keep writing those books!

:o)

Tess MacKall said...

You know, Brindle. I love your name, truly do. But when I first saw your name at Three Wicked Writers Plus Two--before I read your post on the great Alpha--I saw your name and assumed you were a woman. Brindle isn't really gender specific--at least not for me.

So I would not have known you were a man had I not read the contents of your post. The problem with reading romance when it's written by a man is that it usually sounds male. Now the same can be said for female writers writing male pov. But when we women write male pov, we can get away with a bit more than a man can when he writes female pov.

But I read your excerpt this morning on Three Wicked Writers Plus Two and it was as I said in my comment to you on group---"nicely done". It did not read at all like a man had written it. So bravo!

Having a man in this almost all female club is nice--especially when he actually can pull it off. And I think you do. So I'll be reading your books for sure. Keep 'em coming!

Brindle Chase said...

Ahhh, thanks Sara! Don't worry, I will. I love writing too much!

*beams*@Tess. Well, in all honesty, I purposely chose a "gender neutral" name and wanted something unique. I settled on Brindle and Chase just seemed to flow with it. And it works... *lol* It disguises my gender very effectively. I don't hide that I'm male, but I don't advertise either. My hope is, one doesn't figure it out until AFTER they've read something I've written. Hehehe... its harder to dismiss an author for their gender if you just posted a glowing review of their book.

Anywho, I'm glad you liked the excerpt and that having a male author lurking about your writing blogs doesn't bother you. I promise to behave... at least a little. *lol* I'm anxious to read some of your books too!

Emmy Ellis said...

Good Lord, it doesn't bother us you're here, Brindle. The more the merrier!

:o)

Tess MacKall said...

Well, if you behave, Brindle, we won't be happy at all. LMAO

Brindle Chase said...

Thanks Sarah!

*winks*@Tess... I didn't say HOW I would behave. *weg* Don't encourage me though... I'm a notorious flirt.

Liz said...

so I'm late the this party BUT will be adding my own Wenchie voice to this amazing group of women so here goes:

My favorite response to anyone who flares a nostril at either my attire which will vary given that I masquerade as a small business owner by day (more on that later, promise) or my writings (usually men who think I must be way fun which is something I don't necessarily discourage or the few women who aren't jealous that I'm actually published and are, typically neither as interesting, as fit, or as attractive for women Of An Age as myself)--I think: "Oh, cool, my target audience!" Smile and pat their greasy heads and brush the danish crumbs off their sweatshirts and sashay on off.