Thursday, 28 April 2011

Cheeky Sod!

So, I woke this morning (as you do), checked my emails then went on Facebook (as you do). I saw I had a private message and clicked on it, expecting it to either be from a friend or some form of invite to a page or event.

Oh no. It wasn't anything like that. It was a message from some guy who simply wrote: You need a face-job.

Ohhh, yes, he really said that.

I thought: Hmm, maybe I do need a face-job, mate, but you won't be able to tell from THAT photo. I have gained wrinkles since then and bags under my eyes (how bloody delightful growing older is...). Besides, if I need one, is it any of your pissing business? And then I thought: Does he not realise that picture was changed in Photoshop? The hue/saturation? Does he think I go around with eyeliner that thick (okay, sometimes I do) and my face is pure effing white like that?

So I checked him out. He wasn't on my friend's list. So this guy, some random bloody stranger, decided he would send me that message. And get this...if he's judging on appearances, then so the hell am I. HE needs a bloody face-job. Ugly old busstard.

So, while it didn't overly bug me (not what he said, just the gall he had in actually saying something so rude), I then sat and thought: Uh-oh. Is "face-job" some new sexual term I'm not aware of? Does he want to do rude things to my face involving his doo-dar? And why would he think I'd find him attractive (think 1980s guy with a bad haircut) and allow him to get his wanger out and "face-job" my face?

There are so many perverts on Facebook, you have to wonder, don't you? Mind you, there are many rude people too. I won't even go down the road about why a woman felt the need to make a sarcastic comment about one of my excerpts on my page. MY PAGE! Oh, dear. I went down that road. Oh well. Jeez, I thought Facebook was a safe place to play, but what with barbs being thrown like this, I may well stop playing there.

Face-job, indeed.

Yeah, mate, if you saw me in ASDA the other day, squinting because I'd squirted washing detergent in my bloody eye, then you might be right in thinking I need one.




Cassie Exline said...

What a jackass, but I loved your "doo-dar" comment. People's rudeness astounds me. What happened to common sense?

Anthology Authors said...

You know, Sarah, when people do that, it's because they usually feel they need it. (Eg. My brother used to call me "fatso" when in fact he needed to lose weight.) So rather than acknowledge their own insecurities, they go and insult someone else. People are idiots. And you don't need a face job. Beauty comes from within, and you've got that in spades. :)

Emmy Ellis said...

No idea, Cassie. Such an odd experience!


Emmy Ellis said...

Bless ya, Marci!


Cassie Exline said...

As to the photo, I'd always thought it was dramatic and artistic.

Melissa Bradley said...

Man Sarah, how effing rude and ignorant! People think they have the right to say whatever the hell they want to others about our appearance. Who died and left them judge? And they feel so safe doing it online because you can't run them over with your car. Love your comment about 80's man with bad haircut. Spit out my iced tea. ;)

Emmy Ellis said...

Dramatic...LOL Cassie. I did it because although it's me, it still hides me a bit. I look nothing like that now, sadly.


Emmy Ellis said...

Glad I made you laugh, Melissa. Hee hee.


Casey Sheridan said...

Face job? You? *shaking my head*. I don't think so.

What a butthead this guy is.

I always liked that pic of you, thought it was quite artistic.

Faith said...

You know I love that pic, Em. I have it in my best cyber pals scrapbook!

I get snark all the time online, and what's worse is that I always treat others, whether online or in person, with respect and kindness (unless they hurt my family in some way, then I'm hell on wheels). People are insecure, I guess. If they're miserable they're not happy or comforted unless others feel the same way.

Valerie Mann said...

I'm amazed at your ability to not hunt the busstard down and cut off his doo-dar and beat him with it. If you decide to do it, let me know so I can come watch. :D What a loser.

Emmy Ellis said...

He must have been having a mean day, Casey. Or something. Bless...


Emmy Ellis said...

Bloody weirdo, he is, Faith. I have another message from someone else now, asking if I remember him from the 1200s or something, that we were betrothed and he waited back then until I was 14 to marry me. PARDON?


Emmy Ellis said...



Janice said...

I looked up facejob on Urban dictionary and there are two things for facejob.

An exclamatory phrase used to indicate that someone has been made a fool of (perhaps after having been proved false); can be used to make one feel self-conscious and/or embarrassed; often emphasized with hand gestures around the face.


when one receives a blowjob while checking/ updating ones facebook

similar to a blumpkin
dude my girlfreind just gave me the best facejob and i blew a load all over the key board.


Faith said...

Janice, this world never ceases to amaze me. I've learned a lot from an urban dictionary I sometimes use but I'm often sorry I looked something up, lolol.

Fiona McGier said...

I always think of the source of the rudeness as some middle-aged schlepp who still lives in his mother's basement because he works some minimum wage job and he has bad hygiene. He sits his pasty-faced ass down at the computer for hours on end, typing with one hand and doing God-only-knows-no one-else-wants-to with the other hand! Always makes me feel better.

Jeff LoSsOfReAliTy Gonsalves said...

I think that goofball needs a new pair of glasses!