Between juggling upcoming writing deadlines, blog obligations, a very sick li'l boy, and dealing with family matters, I've pared off some things on my usual to-do list so I can focus on meeting my deadlines and be able to think more coherently.
Obviously it isn't working. ::snort::
This got me to thinking about some of the crazy things people do when they're exhausted or burnt-out.
Lately I'll be telling one of my kids or my hubby something only to have the thought fizzle. I'll stand there and try to grasp the last bits of the thought train only to sigh and watch that li'l thought caboose fade into the sunset.
"Mom, what's the matter with you?"
"I'm tired. My brain misfires when I'm tired."
"Then take a break from stuff."
"I would," I often reply, "if people around here would pitch in and help me with things."
And that reply causes mass hysteria because what follows is a stampede for the nearest exits.
Lovely.
As for my earlier coffee comment...let's be honest. Drinking more coffee doesn't aid in helping you be more alert. It just makes you clueless AND hyper.
Ever have those days where you're frazzled and you're looking for your misplaced spectacles only to realize after two hours of searching for them that they're on top of your head?
Oh! Oh! Here's a good one that I still tease my hubby about. He'd been working overtime, going in earlier and working later, and one day when he'd gotten home from work, the phone rang and he answered it. He talked to the person for about fifteen minutes, said goodbye, got up out of his chair, walked to the kitchen, opened the refrigerator and placed the cordless on the top shelf, slamming the door shut.
Watching this with amazed amusement, I said, "Honey, why'd you hang the phone up in the fridge?"
He blinked stupidly. "What?"
"You hung the cordless up in the fridge."
"No, I didn't."
"Yes, you did."
Irritated with me, he yanked open the door. "No, goddammit I—"
I burst out laughing. He grabbed the phone and put it back on the charger. "Shut up," he said gently. "Not one word. I'm tired."
Exhaustion does wild things to a person's mind, body and attitude. It makes me worry about air traffic controllers who were out partying all night. {Glances around guiltily} Yeah, I have some bizarre thoughts that cross my mind.
My youngest daughter fell asleep on the loveseat after school on Friday. I woke her, told her to go upstairs and take a nap. The following morning she finally woke from that nap. She asked who sent her upstairs, and I replied that I had. She remembers nothing about it.
Man, I'd love to be twelve and a half again with juggling several boyfriends and keeping my grades up as my only stress factors!
Ever walk into a closet thinking it's the bathroom or have one of your children pull a crazy stunt in their sleep? One of my cousin-in-laws, who was about eight at the time, wandered into a kitchen full of adults. It was around 11 PM, and he sauntered through in his PJs, opened the door to the sink cabinet, and whizzed underneath the sink. OMG, I thought his grandmother was going to come unglued. He remembered nothing about it the next morning, which sort of took the fire out of Grandmother's ire, lol.
Heck, I've gotten so bad of late with my exhaustion that my kids insist they've told me something, yet I have no recollection of it. Mind you, with the youngest girl, I sometimes wonder if she watches for moments when I'm drained to ask me things I would normally say no to. She'll swear I've agreed to something that I have no memory of even discussing with her! I know I'm not the only one who suffers this sort of weariness because the hubby has done the same thing to me. I'll tell him I have an appointment somewhere, and he'll ask why I never told him, and then the argument is in full swing.
Ever sent an email you have no memory of writing let alone hitting SEND? I have! Thank God my brain kicked on to autopilot and knew what it was doing because I sure as hell didn't! I'll sit at my desk frowning and scratching my head as I wonder when I'd sent that email and then marvel over the fact that I'd had intentions of doing so but got sidetracked, and then marvel further over the fact that the email is spelled correctly and makes sense! HAHAHA!
Oh, here's another one: if you're a harried writer with a deadline, have you ever opened your manuscript file the next day to find several hundred words you don't remember writing? {slowly raises hand}
How I manage to do this could only have two possible answers. A) I have a split personality and no one's bothered to tell me about it yet, or B) My brain is a wired in such a manner that it has an emergency override mechanism that I'm just now discovering.
The strange things we do when tired, such as driving fifty miles and not remembering any of it, makes one wonder about the mysterious powers of the mind, doesn't it? And we do some hilarious things when we're on overload mode like saying words backward. That's another one I'm notorious for.
"I'm bed going to go."
My oldest daughter will crack up. "WHAT???"
I pause, consider what I just said and then start laughing too. "I'm going to go to bed, now shut the hell up and leave me alone."
She walks away giggling her head off.
How about being slaphappy or what some call punch drunk? Again, it's another of my exhaustion traits, but my oldest dau suffers it too. When we get together and are both slaphappy, my hubby just shakes his head and walks into the kitchen where he watches TV. Within seconds the volume goes up to drown us out.
I'm hoping to get caught up on deadlines AND rest soon, but so far I'm a cat chasing its tail.
On a side note, I want to share a nice interview HERE and also tell you about the li'l ticker(s) on the side bar. If you look under my section you'll see a green one with a jockey and a horse. What we're doing is posting tickers about our latest WIP or a personal goal. Mine is for my latest agented novel that I'll start any time now. When we decide to mention our goal, you can peek at the tickers under our names to see how we're doing.
35 comments:
Gawd blimey, I know exactly what you mean. There are days I'm out of it, then lay on the sofa just for a minute...and wake hours later. Other times I'm so tired that I can't sleep. I hate that. Body's shattered, but the mind keeps going.
Yes! I've read parts of my books and wondered: Was that really me?
I have the same thing going on with my youngest boy with the "not knowing what he's doing when he's been woken" thing. It's funny to watch him going about in a daze.
My youngest sleepwalks from time to time. Worrying when we're all asleep. Once, she piddled on my sofa thinking she was on the toilet, and another time she came into our room, jiggled her arm about, and informed us she was frying us some sausages.
BLESS!
:o)
OMG...I've gotta run C to school, but I'll be back to comment on this. LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Sarah, I remember doing the same as your youngest when I was prolly about the same age too. What? Somewhere between 6 and 8? Or how about being so wiped out you've sat on the toilet lid and started to pee only to be nearly done when you realize the tinkle sound ISN'T there, lol. However, when we were kids we played outside from daylight until dark, so when it was bedtime, we dropped into the covers like rocks.
And as for laying down to close my eyes for a few minutes and waking up hours later, I've been doing that of late too!
Glad you got a giggle this morning, Tess!
lol...hilarious post, Faith. And I can so relate. Been suffering insomnia for over a year and I've done some weird stuff.:( It'd be nice to get out of bed refreshed instead of more exhausted than before you went. Hope it gets better for you.
Yup, I've pee'd on the toilet seat when I hadn't even been asleep. I was reading an engrossing book at the time. LMAO
:o)
Lisa, I know exactly what you're talking about. I suffer insomnia, too, and the following day or two I'm literally dragging. My mother is the same way but she'll go three or four days straight with no sleep. She's done some really scary things as a result and has to take that one sleep aid...Lunesta?
LMAO @ engrossing book. Sarah, you crack me up! At least you didn't fall IN the toilet. That's one thing I detest sooooo much. I've got the hubby trained now, but when the oldest boy was still living at home, he just couldn't seem to grasp the words "put the toilet seat down or I'll tie your ears in a knot!" I can't count how many times me or one of the girls would be so sleepy, sit down to pee, and fall in the toilet bowl! Yuck!
Well, you're sure not alone. Or is it that I'm not alone? LOL....
An old WWII song, Dipsey Doodle, says that when you talk backwards, you're just a "victim of the Dipsey Doodle, it's your tongue that's at fault, not your noodle"...well, if that makes you feel any better! LOL..
Enjoyed the post!
Well, C. Zampa, my noodle needs a vacation, lol!
This sounds so familiar, Faith. Many years ago, I was driving back to the university after visiting my parents. (A three hour drive) It was late for me at the time as I rose most mornings around 6 am (10 pm), and about an hour from my destination, I had to roll down the window and turn the radio on to stay awake. How I arrived in one piece, I will never know. The last 45 minutes is a blank. I remember none of it.
I haven't been sleeping well lately. (sigh) Exhaustion has been a constant companion, ergo why I am up before 6 am. I am going to do my best to stay pleasant all day. LOL We shall see.
A fine example of messing up words. I don't just put them in the wrong sentence, I transpose letters.
Eg. Could you please bab the grutter for me?
DD, you geed to shet your noes on.
And so on. It's hilarious as no one, not even myself is sure of what I was trying to say. (g)
I've been driving and was so tired we pulled over, but I don't remember how we got pulled over or where we were when I woke up, lol. I think you'd blend really well with my fam re language, lol. We all speak babble!
LOL, Faith. My mind also has a tendency to take a trip down gutter lane when I'm tired. I do my best to contain that while around DD, but sometimes it's hard. LOL
I remember one time when I was unpacking the groceries I put the package of toilet paper in the refrigerator.
And putting the dirty spoon in the cupboard instead of the dishwasher.
I hope you get some rest soon, Faith.
Hi Casey. Yes, I have to say I've put some odd things like that in the refrigerator too. I've also taken things out of the fridge to go make it or open it and find it's not what I had intended to get. Like an apple and find myself with a bottle of pop. Worse, I've grabbed spices thinking I'd picked up the salt only to pour a ton of cinnamon into the pot or pan, lol.
Okay, here we go:
1)Get in the car to drive three miles into town and forty-five minutes later end up in another town. And have NO recollection of the drive.
2)Phone in the freezer--been there, done that.
3)Trying to put the broom into the upright freezer instead of the broom closet and being pissed off when you force it cause it WON'T fit because of the shelves in said freezer.
4)Driving past a store four times because you keep missing the driveway and circling the block to do it right the next time and still can't get it right.
5)When dinner is ready, just yelling SUEY! Cause you can't remember the names of any of your family members.
6)Putting your bra on OVER your blouse and then looking up in the mirror to try and see why it feels wrong and then taking at least half a minute to figure out what the problem is even though you're staring at it.
7)Paying the electric bill over the phone with your debit card and having the dude on the other end tell you that the name and acct number you've given him doesn't match---AND discovering you gave him your pen name.
8)Pouring yourself a glass of diet coke complete with ice. Setting it down and turning around just to do it again in yet another glass.
9)Going into the store to buy drinks and coming out with dog food.
10)Locking your keys in your car and calling the cops to get your door open just to discover the passenger side was unlocked anyway.
11)Going to bed with your clothes on--including socks and shoes.
12)Brushing your teeth with Ben Gay.
13)Grabbing the Tylenol at eleven a.m. because you have a crushing headache and so much to do--and tossing them in your palm, and down the hatch, just to realize when you set the bottle down it was a bottle of Tylenol PM instead of regular.
14)Pouring salt in coffee--yeah, really shook it in there--instead of sugar.
15)Telling someone to hold on when you're on the phone, setting the phone down and just never going back again. Two hours later your Sis drives up in the yard to tell you your phone is off the hook. (Why didn't she just call the cell number? sighhh)
16)Learning to love the smell of burnt food cause that's all you do anymore---burn it.
17)Getting change back from a cashier for a fifty and gushing all over her for her honesty because you're so grateful she gave you back the change---uhhh, I thought I'd given her a five--she was just doing her job and for some odd reason I got all excited--guess I thought she could read my mind and knew I was thinking it was a five and therefore could have been dishonest. Okay, I know that makes no sense---but that should be a clue as to the degree of my craziness.
Okay, that's enough examples from me. Feel free to call the men in white coats. Tell them to bring the net. I'm ready. Just give me time to find my PEOPLE OF WALMART outfit and they can just drop me off.
HAHAHAHAHA @ #3, #10, and #14!!!!!!!!!
You may well have bigger toilets, Faith. All I know is, I'd have to lose lots of weight to fall down mine!
:o)
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH @ Tess' tired examples.
:O)
ROFLMAO @ Tess's tired examples
I'm so glad no one sent the white coats after me. I really dreaded getting into my Wal-Mart suit.
But you ladies know what part of the problem is don't you? Or maybe even most of the problem.
We're busy giving our brain power to others. Sarah, as Natalie Dae, wrote a post over at Three Wicked Writers Plus Two entitled: The Bloody Oracle.
And that's us. "Where's the mayo?"
To which you reply: "It's in the fridge, duh." To which they say: "No it's not."
So you get up, go to the fridge and point to the mayo.
Happens constantly around here. No one can find a damn thing. My brother--who lives with us--temporary arrangement going on nine years now--could not find his ass with both hands superglued to it.
Just this past weekend he's kickin' up a big damn fuss cause someone moved his sunglasses and "I always put them in the same damn place. One of you moved them. Probably broke them and threw them away hoping I'd think I'd lost them."
So I just pointed to the top of his head where they were perched quite nicely. And he did not even have the decency to apologize.
Yeah, your DH isn't the only one to lose things sitting right on his head, Faith. LOL
I do that with my cell phone, actually--well, it's not on my head, but in my hand, and I'll start yelling: "Who moved my cellular device people?"
Ain't life grand?
"No one can find a damn thing. My brother--who lives with us--temporary arrangement going on nine years now--could not find his ass with both hands superglued to it."
I'm in the office laughing my freaking head off at that one!
This stuff is just too incredible for us to make up, ain't it? LOL
OMG you could be me. Hubby will say he discussed something with me that I have no clue about. I get an email and have o clue what they're talking about and have to go into my sent files to find out what the hell the person is talking about. And when I'm over tired, I get into a giggle fit that makes my hubby shakes his head and my kids break out in laughter. When I start giggling, my middle son will always say, "Oh crap, mom's ovber tired again." LOL
But get them to help out when I;m overstressed. HA HA HA HA . I need to have a total meltdown before that happens.
((((((((((Hugs))))))))) to you Faith. I know how you feel.
Oh, and sorry if this is a mess of spelling and grammar errors. It's been a rough week for me and I am beyond tired.
I feel for you, Shiela. Why is it the family never wants to help until we moms have a major meltdown?
Well, at least you send the emails. I'll start one, think I've hit send, only to find it hiding behind the main mail window half finished. Now how the bleep did that happen? And in my mind, I really thought I'd sent it.
LMFAO Tess. My son calls it a telephonic device.
:o)
I usually just say "cell" as in, "I'm on my cell, or here's my cell, or OOOH, my cell is talking to me."
But for some odd reason, when I seemingly cannot find it, it all of a sudden becomes.....
THE CELLULAR DEVICE
The worse "oops" moment for me was when I called my husband "Adam." Not his name. In my defense, besides being tired, I was working on a story that consumed me. It was the lead character's name. I got a "uh huh, sure it is."
Okay, true confession here, I'm a history buff. At work I write a column featuring events that happened 25, 50 and 75 years ago in this town. Well I didn't mean any harm, I was tired and rushing to get it written.
Anyway, there was a mention of one of the town's big shots using mace 50 years ago. Wow! Didn't know there was mace 50 years ago, so I used it in the column.
Hells bells, the mayor was furious. It was his father who had maced residents at a senior citizen home.
Yes, I knew the dude was his father, but there was mace 50 years ago. Who knew! I sure didn't.
AAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHA @ man macing residents! I shouldn't laugh, but that struck my bloody funny bone!
:o)
Thanks for this awesome blog post. You ladies are hilarious and made my day.
And the dude was a lawyer. That must have been some meeting.
I got the biggest laugh out of the mace thing too!
I can SO relate! With everything you saiZZZzzzzzzz! What? Did you ask me something? What am I doing on this blog? ;-)
Cassie, I did the same once, but it wasn't a male character's name. It was my ex's. I could've died, but my soon-to-be husband (my hubby now) totally understood, thank God! Seriously, after you're used to yelling someone's name when you argue and then you get into an argument with someone new, it's only natural for the wrong name to pop out of your mouth, right? Right??? LOL!
Maeve, you're catching what we have. Run! Run while you can! LMAO!
When I am really tired and brain-fried, I walk into a room and forget whey I went in there. I also misplace things like Faith does with her glasses.
Faith, I hope you can get some rest soon.
I read the other comments. You ladies are a riot.
Glad to have you here with us, Celtic Chick! :-)
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