Part II of An Editor's Erotic Tale of Really Awful Lines and Actions Deserving of a Snarky Blog~

by Evil Editors Kate Richards & Valerie Mann

(continued from yesterday)... 

A frown marred Gabriel's perfectly-chiseled, golden features and lips as he eyed the puddle of arousal in the seat Tatiana’s exotic rear end had just vacated. Her nether folds pressed enticingly against her lacey white panties under her calf-length, straight, faded, long denim skirt. Her desire was evident in the way her eyes kept roaming all over his erection, leaving a trail of eye-slime behind. He tossed his mane of hair over his shoulders.

But he didn’t mind. The bar reminded him of one he went to two millennia before in Jerusalem where this guy came in and told me about a sale on loincloths down at the agora. So Tatiana’s double D’s pressed enticingly against the folds of her erotic skirt and I took her hand in my hand and hand in hand we left the bar.

I’d only come in to ask directions to the nearest church, because in all my three hundred years of immortal life I’d never had a lurid sexual encounter, but I thought why not?

I felt that I realized what I noticed about her nether folds.

He inhaled on a breath. He thought he knew it was time to lose his virginity to Teresa, who gripped his arm and tugged him down the shadowed, anxious street. Nervous fingers smudged his blue T-shirt that clung to his defined chest.

He turned into a hotel.

He walked through the glass door.

Elegant chandeliers led the way to the elevator.

Tatiana grinned. “I never dreamed I’d be spending the night locked in lurid erotic poses with an angel named Gabriel.

“My name is Sam.” He was afraid she would reject him once she knew the true facts about him. Nervous wings fluttered in his back.

“No it’s not.” She licked her lips in anticipation.  Tatiana unbuttoned the top button on her own blouse with cheerful hands. “All angels are named Gabriel except the female ones and I don’t care what they’re named.”

His erection made the decision for him, bursting through a weak spot in his faded jeans to bob enticingly in the cool air. His manhood’s excitement transmitted itself to her and she was happy.

“Wow what a beautiful penis and I particularly am enticed by the amount of pre-cum on the tip, sparkling in the ambient lighting. But, I like all male organs, and compare them whenever possible on a list of features including whether they are shaved, how many veins stick out and what shade of purple their mushroom head is.”

“Okay, I’m Gabriel, then,” he nodded, confused. “But you have to let me tie you to the bedposts and have my way with you.”

“But I thought you said it was your first time?”

“I didn’t, I only told the reader.”

“And isn’t it odd that a virginal angel would tie me to the bedpost on his first time out of the block?”

He frowned, lines creasing his smooth white skin as the jasmine aroma of her arousal rose to his nose. It clashed with his own nutmeg pheromones.

“Yes, but that doesn’t matter.” He grasped her nervous fingers with freaked out hands and tied her to the bedposts of the queen sized bed, covered with shiny, expensive black satin comforter and black lace pillows.

“No, Gabriel,” she shrieked. “I had no idea we were here to have sex. And the condoms are in my pocket. I bought the extra jumbo size to accommodate the massive manhood I knew you'd have.”

He pulled the condoms out of her pocket and ripped the package open with his teeth while he yanked off his jeans and silk boxers. Shoving her skirt to her waist, he grabbed her new lacey white panties and tore them away. He wrung them out over the bed.

“Is all this for me?”

“You know it, handsome. Now come and get me!?”

He frowned, surprised that she could upset him so much with bad punctuation. “I am not sure. I will be condemned forever to the fiery pits if I roll this condom on and have my way with you,” he growled, using his teeth to do so.

“I’m worth it,” she screamed, and reached the peak of excitement, falling into an abyss of glorious orgasm at the very thought.

To be continued....