Disintegrating Underwear

And it ain't pretty. You see, the last time I visited my mom, we went shopping at Wally World. Well, every time we visit Mom, we go there. The closest one near us in is Compton. While Compton might be a perfectly nice town, it's not a particularly safe area, or at least that is its reputation.

I needed some new underwear. Some of my panties date back to, um, college. So, um, about (cough, cough) ten years ago--maybe more. (More. No doubt it's more. ;) ) Those panties are finally starting to disintegrate. It's hard to get rid of them, though. It's not easy to find Looney Tunes and Disney print any more for adults. This is very sad to me. I'm going to miss my Taz, Bugs Bunny, Sylvester, Tweety, and Mickey and Minnie Mouse undies.

I suppose it's time to grow up. (Nooooo!)

(These pairs from college, by the way, lasted ten years longer than the ones we purchased from Victoria's Secret. So, yeah, I purchased those like, um, two years go. Yeah, two years ago. Grin)

Having thrown away a third pair of underwear, and seeing that a few others were hanging on by a thread or falling off of me (if underwear needs a pair of pants to keep them on, it's time to let them go), I decided it was time to purge and pick up some new ones. I don't know about you, but I have issues paying $10 a pair, especially after the dismal performance of the Victoria's Secret panties. The $2 pair last just as long as the $10. Since we were going to Wally World anyway, I figured I might as well look there.

Buying underwear is nearly as frustrating as buying jeans. It's hard to find the kind I like. I don't want grannie panties, I won't wear thongs, I'm not into low rise, and I don't want French cut. (I've tried those. I just don't like underwear up around my waist. They might as well start just below my bra.) Just give me bikini or string bikini style. Apparently, everyone else in my size buys bikini as well because the pickings were slim.

After several minutes of searching, lo and behold, I found a package of six for $10, they were my size, AND they were Hanes "guaranteed not to ride up." As I am of the firm belief that thongs belong on feet and not covering my female parts, they sounded perfect. I bought a pack of a different brand as well. And, yes, they creep. Not too badly because they are the right size.

However, one pair of the new underwear is already starting to fray. One washing and it's fraying. Seriously? And it's the aqua blue, my favorite color of the batch. (sigh)

Now, the guaranteed not to rise pairs keep their promise, but--of course there's a "but"--they don't rise because the holes for your legs are so tight they not only prevent the panties from creeping, they cut the circulation off. Okay, it's not that bad. However, throughout the day, I feel like a man when I wear them because I have to make minor adjustments to relieve the pressure...on my legs, that is. (g) Which would explain why there were so many of the bikini cut in my size. (g)

BTW, when looking for graphics to accompany this post, instead of holey underwear, there were pictures of a really hairy back (Ack!), a dildo, a welcome to New Jersey cartoon, and this one:

Disintegrating underwear never looked so good. (g)