Friday, 2 November 2012

Beware of the Wife

When it comes to my writing, I’m a creature of habit. I work from about 8 AM until about 2 PM five days a week. Sometimes I work on the weekends, but very seldom anymore. The weekends are for family and also for me to let my brain and eyes rest. It’s bad enough when my writing routine is messed up by doctor appointments or the school calling me to come pick up a kid or drop something off that either one has forgotten, but when it’s other people who don’t care that I’m working or think I just play on my laptop—I’m assuming this is the case, because they just won’t leave me alone....

The landlords, their hired hands, or the landlords grown children have been in and out of our driveway so much—doing only God knows what in the fields and the far barn—I now know the very sound of their vehicles when they pull in. No call or text that they’ll be out here; nope, they just show up out of the blue. My older kids stop by unannounced or they’ll text and say they’re on their way over, so I have to set aside what I’m doing. I love my kids, but because I’m Mom, I guess I’m supposed to let the interruptions slide.

But I hate being a mean ass. I really do. Sadly, I’m going to have to start biting heads off. As a matter of fact, I found a graphic online, blew it up, and posted it at our main door.


About a month ago our minister showed up unannounced one Saturday afternoon. He was on his way to town and thought he’d stop by to check on us. Yes, we’d missed a month of church, but it had been one virus after another that the two kids here at home had kept passing back and forth; the dau was so sick the last round she missed a week of school. Anyway, I’m sitting in my writing chair doing her hair for homecoming that night. I was wearing nothing but undies and an oversized t-shirt when the minister came to the door. [groan] Grabbing my nearby cardigan, I then tossed it over my lap a moment before he walked inside...but he paused at the door.
Uh, oh.

The preacher came in and sat across from me. “Saw your sign by the door. Did you put that there for a reason?”


Looking him directly in the eye I replied very firmly, “Yes, I did.”

“All right, then.”

All right, indeed.

That sign is perfect for me. I admit it. Don’t even worry about a dog. Beware of the wife because she’s had it up to eyebrows with interruptions, people wanting this and that, and family who think I don’t really work....

There are two adorable cabins down in the hollow from us that are just big enough for a single person. I wonder if I could rent one cheap? But you know what? I’d probably still have to make another beware sign and post it on the cabin’s front door, too. {{sigh}}

Quick announcement: Avoid Writer's Hell is back! It will now function as a blog and a wonderful website for the revised, expanded book is in the works. For the first blog article visit


trinity said...

Always my friend always, last week it was the storm no school. I thought I would pull my hair out I was so waiting to dig into my story, but once the kids are home forget it. Husband is the same way. All day today he sat right next to me, I'm bored. I looked at him and started listing the things that needed to be done around here, did he do one of them? NO! Now his leg is hurting him. Grrr!
I told you we need to pack our bags and just leave for a week. Let everyone fend for themselves and go! Not a word to anyone. :) We can meet half way in Ohio somewhere.

Jaime Samms said...

The only way the cabin will work, Faith, is if you pick one further from home and don't tell anyone about it. Seriously...

Faith said...

Trin, I was actually mulling over that Ohio getaway this afternoon. If gas and grocery prices would come down to where they're manageable, I'll be the first to book at least a weekend. But you're right. After this past spring/summer, it needs to be at least a full week!

Jaime, I wouldn't even tell them where the cabins are, LOL!

Liza O'Connor said...

I love that sign.

I would have to modify it, since I tossed my husband years ago for being grumpy and high maintenance...among other things.

Forget the dog that attacks bears, Beware of the Deranged Owner.

I think that would represent me well.

Excellent Blog

Now I just have to get by the spam guard.

Jessica Subject said...

I think that's just part of being a mom. Some days I'm lucky if I can go to the bathroom without being interrupted. But when the kids are at school, I try and get as much done as possible. Most of the time, this include more than just writing.

Faith said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Faith said...

Had to remove my comment and start over. Not awake yet so I can't spell, LMAO!

Yay, you got past the spam filter, Liza! LOL! As for the sign, it's been hanging there going on six months now.

Morning, Jessica. Yeah, I'm Mom, the one who fixes all, does, all but only knows all when *they* need advice or info, lol.

Fiona McGier said...

Usually I try to out-wait everyone, staying up later than any of them can stand! Then I can write in peace. Unfortunately, that means that if I get a call to sub, it will be at 6am, and I'll have to get up and know I'll be bumping into walls all day, or falling asleep anytime I sit down!

Particularly endearing is when my kids come down to sit behind me while I'm tapping on my laptop...then when I ignore them because I'm in the middle of a scene, they start to lean over my shoulder and read. My daughter like to comment, "Really Mom? Is that even physically possible?" "Ew! Please tell me you never did that with Dad!" Etc. When I turn and growl at her, she laughs.

Then there's the husband who does subtle things like coming up behind me to worm his hand down my shirt, saying, "I volunteer to help you try that out to see if it can be done." Sigh.

But we persevere. We're writers, not crazy people...most of the time!

Janice Seagraves said...

My mom will call and talk for hours, my husband plays the TV too loud when he's home and then there's the daughter. *sigh*

This is why I write really late at night.