Embarrassing Moments

Please help us welcome Randi Alexander today.

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I want to thank ­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­Four Strong Women for letting me guest blog today. I'm Randi Alexander and I write cowboy erotic romance. I'm published with The Wild Rose Press' Cowboy Kink line. My second Cowboy Kink, Her Cowboy Stud, was released today! Yee-haw!

I've got to talk about kids. Why are they so nosey? There is nowhere to hide anything that they cannot get into. I love them dearly, but it's just incredible to me that they are so curious.

When eight-year-old LittleGuy thought he was alone in the dining room, I watched him go through every drawer and every cabinet in my credenza. It took him nearly a half hour. What did he expect to find? Candy? Cash? A wooden chest filled with gold doubloons? It's a credenza. It's got tablecloths and gravy boats.

When he turned around and saw me sitting there, he said, "I'm going outside," and took off. No embarrassment, no guilt. Gotta love the obliviousness of youth.

The worst was when six-year-old Pink (her nickname because of her red hair) found my Barbies. I've been trying to write a ménage, and since I have no experience (writing or otherwise…) I bought a Barbie and two Kens to help me visualize the positions.

They were expensive! When you buy the ones that are highly bendable, they cost about twenty dollars each. And knowing how Pink treats her toys, I hide them when I'm not…um…posing them.

Last week, I was cooking supper, and Pink stomps into the kitchen, crosses her arms, and asks, "Why do you have brand new Barbie dolls under your bed?" This was accompanied by a serious glare.

For a moment, I felt guilty. Probably a leftover from my Roman Catholic upbringing. Then I thought, hey, those are my dollies!

I turned to her, crossed my arms, and with a raised eyebrow, retorted, "What were you doing under my bed?"

Her redhead-pale cheeks blushed, but to her credit, she didn't back down. She waved her hand as if to erase everything we'd just said, and rolled her eyes. "That doesn't matter," she said. "Just give me their clothes so I don't have to look at them nakies."

Oh holy crap. I'd forgotten the threesome was nakies. Buck nakies. A blush rose to my cheeks, and I mumbled something about them taking a bath because it was Saturday night, bla, bla, bla. I went to find where I'd hidden Barbie's bikini and blond Ken and brunette Ken's surfer duds.

Someday, I'm going find a big honking safe and have it installed in my bedroom closet just to so I can have a place to keep my toys. Until then, Barbie, Ken, and Ken will have to share space with the spare tire in my trunk.

Your turn! I'd love to hear your story of an embarrassing moment when kids, family, or friends found something you wish they hadn't.

Trace McGonagall’s quiet life on his Houston stud ranch is shaken up when gorgeous Macy Veralta arrives to claim an inheritance left to her in his uncle’s will. Trace sees her as just another gold digger, but he also can’t resist her curvy body. When she hints at being the perfect submissive to his Dom, he has to have her.

Macy wouldn’t have been three months late to claim her inheritance if she’d known Trace was sin in jeans. The cowboy’s dominant bearing and the smoldering glint in his eyes send shivers to her toes and stirs images of being bound in his bed and disciplined at his hand. But could Trace’s perfect seduction be part of his plan to reclaim her inheritance?

EXCERPT: Over 18 only please.

“I do sales, but mostly in the Midwest and Northeast. The company I work for has been talking about expanding into the South and West, but…” Macy trailed off, as if thinking.

Trace bet she was thinking the same thing. If she got down here to Texas occasionally, they could make it a regular thing. Even if she was here after his money, he couldn’t ignore the hot, sexy connection between them. Hell, he didn’t have to marry her. One sizzling night a month he could spend some of his bankroll on her.

They’d meet in a high-class Houston hotel. He’d pull her to him, hard and fast, and their kisses would be frantic as they ripped the clothes off each other. He’d tell her with desperation choking his voice, “I want you. Now.” He’d pick her up and press her back against the wall. He’d lift her legs and slide into her hot, wet pussy.

She’d claw his back as he pumped into her, deep and steady, making sure he rubbed her clit with enough finesse to send her over the edge with a scream. Their first rush of lust curbed, they’d fall onto the bed where he’d introduce her to some edgy sex play. Just the basics at first…

“Trace?” Her eyes held a sly gleam. “You seem to be the one who’s doing the staring now.”

To celebrate the release of Her Cowboy Stud, I'm giving away, to one lucky *commenter, an e-copy of my first erotic romance, Chase and Seduction. Just leave a comment today and we'll choose a winner tomorrow. *Commenter must be 18 years of age or older to win.

I'm also giving away a custom made messenger bag and a $50 gift certificate to Pureromance to one subscriber to my newsletter. For more details, and to sign up for this contest, please go to my website, RandiAlexander.com And while you're there, you can read the first chapter of Her Cowboy Stud.

Good luck, and thank you!

Randi

RandiAlexander.com

WildAndWickedCowboysBlog

Her Cowboy Stud available at The Wild Rose Press Wilder Roses

The Moving/Packing Blues

It’s been a whole lot of years—like 20—since I’ve moved. But that’s exactly what I’m doing. Moving.

I’m going to another state and finally going to live my dream of living on the coast! I’m excited for sure.

And a little scared.

In the meantime, I’m making lists. And the lists keep growing. Today we start our first official packing day. You’d think this would be relatively easy. Well, not easy—labor intensive—but not involve a bunch of stupid stuff.

You need boxes to pack, right? Right. Well, finding boxes isn’t that easy. I guess if you don’t mind spending a ridiculous amount of money it’s easy—but not me! I called a couple of moving places about boxes. It was going to cost me $300.00 for boxes and packing tape. HELL NO! I looked in Walmart. Half that price but still a big HELL NO from me. I went online and found  a couple of sites that sell used packing boxes. Used packing boxes? Man…this was getting complicated. Those boxes were about the same price as new ones at Walmart.

So what did I do?

I decided that I deserved FREE boxes. Yep, I did. So I went into my local grocery store and asked for them. Took them about a week to get them together as they realized I’d need different sizes, but they did it. Now these boxes aren’t quite as sturdy as the REAL packing boxes, but I don’t care. They’ll do nicely. I’ve got packing tape to reinforce them, and I can manage. I’ve still got to rent a big truck to the tune of $250.00 a day. I figure I’ll need it a total of two days. Basically, I’ve got the packing and moving part solved. But I’ve got a problem.

No place to live yet. LOL

I’ve been online to every site I can find in the area where I’m moving. I’ve written down the particulars on probably a hundred different houses. And boy did it take a lot of work to find those houses. I never realized so many people were against having pets! But they sure as hell are. LOL And if you do have a pet, be prepared to pay a ridiculous non-refundable pet deposit. Yeah, I know why they do it. Not all animals are the kind you want in your house. Hell, sometimes I don’t even want mine. LOL But they are house broken and they don’t chew. My dogs are the kind that just couldn’t survive outside. They each have their own doggie beds but sometimes you’ll find one in a bed, head on pillow!

The other problem I’ve had with finding a house is location. I don’t want to be on the beach. I’m afraid of storms and flooding. But I don’t want to be more than a few blocks away—within walking distance. Then, of course, there is finding a “good” neighborhood. That takes a lot of research. I’ve even made phone calls to the local police to ask them about particular streets/areas.

There’s one thing for sure, though. I’m learning what is overpriced, underpriced, and spot on. Any time anything is below market value, I wonder why. So I mark those with questions about condition and area. If something is overpriced, again I want to know why. For instance, there is a house I’m interested in because it’s exactly what I want in a house. Hardwood floors throughout. Simple floor plan. Big kitchen. Four bedrooms and a sunroom. Two baths. It even has a nice size yard. In the back there is a huge live oak complete with Spanish moss. Gorgeous!

There are three problems. It’s farther away from the beach than I want to be. Ten blocks. And the yard has NO landscaping. Just a bare yard. But the biggest problem is price. Because of its location and the lack of landscaping I think it’s overpriced. So it’s doubtful I’ll be getting that house. We’ll see.

The worst problem I am facing with this move is cooperation from my kids. They are supposed to be helping me do things. They aren’t. It’s like pulling teeth to get them to do a damn thing. I’m sick of it. So this morning I had to pitch a fit. Now I have a headache. They are working—just barely. I’m not happy. There is just no way I can do everything alone and I shouldn’t have to. But it’s not right I have to beg and finally lose my temper in order to get anything accomplished.

Anybody got any really good suggestions on moving in general. AND…on getting the kids to move their asses!!!!

At least I'm getting good reviews for my latest release from Ellora's Cave--Strip Down. Check it out! 

http://www.jasminejade.com/p-9440-strip-down.aspx

Also available through Amazon  

http://www.amazon.com/Strip-Down-ebook/dp/B005E8ALB6/ref=sr_1_8?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1311696088&sr=1-8

Practical Jokes

Help us welcome erotic romance author Randi Alexander. She writes about cowboys. Apparently, she's into practical jokes and includes that humor in her books. A woman after my own heart. (grin)

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One sunny day, my husband were gardening, and I stuck a flower in my hair, over my ear. Hubby thought it was cute and found another flower to put over my other ear, then one in the bit of cleavage showing above my tank top. After about an hour, we needed to run to the garden center. He drove, or I would have noticed that both the flowers were still in my hair. And the daisy was still in my bosom.

Of course, it's a neighborhood store, so we ran into people we knew, and I couldn't figure out why everyone was smiling at me. And why hubby was smiling at me, too. Not his normal, 'Love 'ya babe!' smile, but a goofy old grin. In the truck on the way home, he burst out laughing. "Look in the mirror." I didn't have to. In that split second, I knew I'd forgotten about the flowers. I must have looked like a hippie to our friends. And the other shoppers. And the store employees. Hubby had a good laugh, and I did chuckle a little. So, Hubby-1, Wifey-0. But not for long.

After supper a couple nights later, hubby asked if we had any sweets. I pulled out the remaining Halloween candy, which was definitely the bottom of the bucket miscellany. He chose a blue sucker, something that came in the variety pack I'd bought. But he was happily slurping away on it.

Then he remembered he had to run to the drug store to get his prescription and asked if I wanted to go along for the ride. I turned to tell him I'd rather not when I noticed his lips were bright blue. Ah, I thought. That's why the sucker was shaped like a paintbrush.

Fighting to keep my wicked 'She's up to something!' smile from ruining this perfect opportunity, I jumped up, grabbed the truck keys, and said, "I'll drive." He shrugged, still working on that very blue sucker.

He finished it as we walked into the drug store, and we headed directly back to the pharmacy counter. We would usually split up, and I'd putter around, doing my little bits of shopping, but that night, I stuck to him like a thistle.

The pharmacist, jotting something on her pad, said, "May I help you?"

"Picking up a prescription for Alexander," he said.

"All right. Just a..." She glanced at him and did a classic double-take, then leaned in closer to examine the blue-lip phenomena.

Hubby stiffened, then smiled, unsure.

I gave it all away, though. With my hand over my mouth, I was holding back laughter, which always makes me snort like a truffle hog. And added to it, my eyes were watering with the pain of keeping it all inside.

Hubby looked at me, then back at the pharmacist. "What did she do now?" He was referring to the other ten or twelve dozen pranks I'd pulled on him during our short but interesting marriage.

She pulled out a little mirror and with a smile and a wink, she showed him.

While she was retrieving his prescription, he stood licking his lips madly, but the blue was pretty much on there for good. "I know what this is," he said between savage licks. "Payback for the flower-in-the-boobies thing, right?"

"Mm...hm. We're all tied up now. Hubby-1, Wifey-1." I love my husband.

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Blurb:

Country music superstar/actor Chase Tanner has yet to be denied anything-and he's never wanted anything or anyone more than gorgeous screenplay writer Reno Linden. So when the film they are working on is finally finished, Chase decides to turn up the volume on seducing Reno.

Reno Linden lived a quiet, rural life until she was thrust into the Hollywood scene when her book was adapted to film. Chase Tanner is larger than life, sinfully sexy and hell-bent on getting her into bed. Skittish after a failed wedding engagement, Reno risks the plunge into Chase's arms, and is surprised that her good girl self can keep up with bad boy Chase.

Though Chase returns to his cowboy roots often, and Reno cherishes the time spent with him on his ranch, the two find their careers pulling them in different directions. Will their attraction survive the glitz and stress of fame?

EXCERPT: Over 18 only

Chase's sports car sat in the driveway and after settling Reno in the passenger seat, he jumped in. He squealed the tires out of the driveway then slowed to cruise along the quiet neighborhood streets.

On a flat stretch, he took her hand. "Reno." His brow furrowed, but he didn't say more.

She watched his profile as they meandered past million dollar houses. The quiet time together was what she needed, yet so poignant it hurt. She'd miss him. Her phone beeped in her purse, and she sighed. "That's my reminder. I have to get to the airport."

He pulled over at a spot with a view of a canyon, and tightened his grip on her hand. "One more day, Reno. I promise I'll make it worth the cost of another plane ticket."

Chase gritted his teeth and fought the urge to steal her away. He wasn't ready to let her go.

Reno stared at him, her eyes sad and slightly red from her tears. Her hand smoothed over his cheek. "I wish I could. But the studio is flying me home in one of their jets. On their way to Canada to pick up some execs who are fishing, or hunting, or something."

He opened his mouth to say he'd arrange for another flight, but she cut him off.

"I have a meeting with my agent tomorrow morning. And..." She sucked in a choppy breath. "...putting it off is just going to make things harder. I need to get home."

"All right." He released her hand, drove to the airport, and found the studio's hangar. Both of them silent.

He wanted to argue. To swing a U-turn and kidnap her. To beg for one more day. But she was right. The closer they got to each other, the harder it would be for them to be apart.

He helped her out of the car and walked her to the plane's steps. This was tough. He didn't know how to say goodbye.

To celebrate the release of Chase and Seduction, I'm giving away, to one lucky *commenter, an e-copy of my novella Her Cowboy Stud. Just leave a comment today and we'll choose a winner tomorrow. *Commenter must be 18 years of age or older to win.

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I'm also giving away a cowgirl hat to one subscriber to my newsletter. For more details, and to sign up for this contest, please go to my website, RandiAlexander.com. And while you're there, you can read the first chapter of Chase and Seduction.

Good luck, and thank you!

Randi's site's:

• RandiAlexander.com
• WildAndWickedCowboysBlog

Buy Chase and Seduction at The Wild Rose Press Wilder Roses