Tuesday, 17 January 2012

Explosive Meltdowns

I’m sure everyone has a meltdown from time to time, but my guess is that women have them more often than men do. My reasoning for this is that women *usually* do most of the child rearing, they work, too, whether it’s out of the home or an in-home business, and women are typically the ones who handle everything else that involves a household such as buying groceries, paying bills, attending school meetings, volunteering, addressing family problems, and so on.

It’s stressful and it’s VERY difficult to find time for oneself so you can relax and create a peaceful state of mind.

Peaceful state of mind? I can’t believe I just typed that. HAHAHAHA!!! In my home, that state doesn’t exist.

Point in case:

I have two children still relatively young under my roof and two grown children who have moved out. One is married with a family. The other is single, has recently moved out of his roommate’s place and is now in a nice li’l rental of his own, and makes excellent money, and a gf who is… GRR! Quick! Subject change!

Anyway, I’m the hub of the family. I’m the one everyone goes to for help whether it’s my kids or my parents. I’m the one who is supposed to leap the tallest buildings in a single bound.

Mom, Mom, Mom, ring, ring, ring….

However, when I’m sick, I’m still expected to kill the Kraken, slay the Cyclops, beat up the Wicked Witch of the West and fend off the vampires.

Add the recent holiday pandemonium, including financial worries, and a couple of publishing deadlines to this and my stress level kept poking holes in the ceiling tiles.

Then it happened. The meltdown AKA Faith loses her mind.

A phone call came in. Mom is needed to run to the rescue. Can you do it? Well, I was put in a position where I had no choice so I blew up. Not because I didn’t want to help my child but because it was just one thing too much on top of the ever-growing pile of chaos that has been my life the past three months.

And wow did I ever have a meltdown. My office is now wounded. It lies in shambles from my fit. I am now without a calculator because it was in a fine shower of plastic splinters across the room. I broke a big, heavy-duty cardboard filing box. A piece of furniture landed on its side on the opposite side of the office.

And then the tears started—but I couldn’t shut them off!

I screamed.

I cursed.

I cried some more.

Then a few days later the monsters came into my home to play. As a result, I had to activate my calm-down button so I could slay the beasts with some quiet verbal spears and daggers that created blessed silence. But all of this drained me, put me way behind in my work, and it was twice as difficult to recouperate after being ill. Did it matter? No. Mom, mom, mom....

Thank God for a wonderful husband, tho. He stood guard at the door, answered calls for a couple days after, and even did the dishes and put supper stuff away three nights in a row. Just those li'l things helped me immensely and showed me someone does care how I feel and what I contend with. Honey, you're a true gem and I love you!

The past couple of weeks it has been relatively quiet. Well, honestly after the past few weeks, it doesn't take much to set me off so I still have my moments of tears and snark that can slice the hide off a Gila monster--dripping sarcasm is often my defense mechanism, but I'm working on curbing it. I’ve realized I do not play well others when I’m stressed. However, those *others* now know I can turn into a bigger monster when enough is enough.

So, dear readers, what was your worse meltdown moment?


trinity said...

Ha I too have had many a melt downs and you know this, because you are there to calm me down. I have no one to talk to around here. Mom feels sorry for everyone else but me, but she sure can come around and bitch about her life. I love my son dearly, but he is worse than any girl or boy i have ever met. If hair is out of place, clothes out of place he has a fit! A temper that you would not believe. Him and his father rival anyone with their behavior. Husband useless! When I have a meltdown he hides in the bedroom. So Faith you are truly special to have the husband you have.
And I am special to have a friend that will listen like you do.

Kate Richards said...

I too have a husband who will step in on occasion and save me from destroying the rest of the house. I just wonder why it requires throwing furniture and the lady of the house's head spinning around for them to notice? LOL Anyway, it means a lot when he does! It will be okay, and I agree with Trinity, thank heavens for our friends!I can IM or call one ofof my besties who will assure me that it will be okay, everyone else is an $#$##! and it's hard being perfect all the time

Faith said...

I'm glad I can be a shoulder to lean on, Trin. You've done the same for me many, many times. Marci is another one who bends my ear and I bend hers, lol.

Kate, if it hadn't been for my hubby stepping in I think I might've packed my bags and moved in with my folks for two or three days just to get some quiet.

Today I took the youngest out to the bus only to find out the Blazer has no brakes. Then an hour later the school called to say he'd thrown up on the bus. So, if someone has to go get him the hubby will have to leave work long enough to do it. I'm praying this isn't the start of another chaotic week.

Kate Richards said...

I'm just glad you weren't hurt! I hope it will be a good week and this was just one last kick from the past one.

Faith said...

Yeah, I thought the same thing. If we had been on a main road or in town...shiver! Thank God it was in our driveway.

Anthology Authors said...

I have meltdowns... Once every 5-6 months or so. (g) I don't throw anything. I just filet anyone who's in my path, usually Charlie, sometimes Lily if she's pushed my buttons.

With everything that's going on right now, I'm ripe for one, but other than a few snarls, I've been pretty good. Although Lily's three tantrums in a row one day were nearly enough for a minor explosion.

And, Faith, you know I'm always here for you... If our kids will let us talk, that is. Mom, Mom, Mom... Drives me nuts sometimes.

Faith said...

Sadly my youngest dau and I have many arguments. Thirteen year old girls...ARGH!

Robyn M Speed said...

I have been known to let out a good, low level roar!!

I get pissed off sometimes and I will do a rant and a rave -- mostly because bloody husband doesn't LISTEN!!! And I get so F-ing tired of being ignored by him. Fortunately I have a few great girlfriends who I can go and vent on -- as we do for each other.

I have to say, it is the women in my life who keep me sane!!!!

It also helps that I have a padded pole in the backyard that I can go and beat the crap out of with a nice 28 inch cane!!!

Valerie Mann said...

My last meltdown was with a professional in the publishing business. She'd pushed my buttons one too many times with her supreme arrogance and condescension. Example: she feels it necessary to call authors with less experience than her, "kids". Ohhhh, you shouldn't have asked for examples, Faith! I'm mad all over again, LOL!

Faith said...

Robyn, I'm lucky in that I have a hubby who listens, but my dilemma is that I hate to rant to him because he works his butt off every day and comes home exhausted. Then there I am having had my long, crummy day and blast him about it. I always end up feeling horrible because that's the last thing he needs to deal with, but he says that's what he's there for.

Valerie, the only thing that person is experienced in is insanity, so let it roll off. I know someone like that in my neck of the woods and I decided that said person was not worth my time nor energy. That very fact I look at thim with pity drives them nuts because they love to be the center of attention.

Janice Seagraves said...

I haven't had any melt downs in the couple of years, thank God.

And Hubby has been wonderful while I've had this blasted cold that won't go away. He does the dishes, laundry and makes me tea.

However I did wake up my daughter in the middle of the night to give her a what-for after I found her brand new flash drive I just bought her in the wash. ( I was staying up late writing and doing laundry.) Turned out it wasn't the new one it was her father's that she couldn't find, and her BF had loaded with Anime that my hubby paid him for. GRRRRR.


Faith said...

My oldest boy was and still is bad about doing such things, Janice.