Oh, the Irony of it all...

Most days, I don't have any huge big rants to rant about.
Lot's of little ones, but nothing really huge. Today is Monday, for example. That's a mini-rant. Just that. It's Monday. Ick. Also, I'm not a morning person. Never have been, but Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday I've have to be out of bed by eight AM. If that isn't rant-worthy, I don't know what the hell is. There are many reasons why we home school, and avoiding eight A.M. mornings is one of the really good ones. So four in a row? And over the weekend? Seriously???? Who hates me? What did I do?!?!?

Also, there is the matter of kids. I mean, I'm not ranting about my kids. I love my kids. I'm ranting about the cost of my kids. Had I known they would be so expensive, I might have stopped at cats.

How cute is that?

And he's perfectly happy with a stick or a beam of sunlight. He doesn't need pointe shoes, an electric guitar or a singe hand-held, portable, 3G enabled, web-browsing personal gaming console. A ball or tinfoil will do nicely, thank you, and can I please fish it out from under the stove again. 

This will teach me for wishing, back in the day, that there was some way to have cheap labour to clean their litter and sweep up their shed fur. Kids do that work for free. It's hidden costs you didn't anticipate that get you in the end.

Then there's working for a living. I suppose if I even remotely liked what I do at my day job, it would be different. But, um, well, I took Fine Art in school. I'm a writer. What the hell happened that I have a day job almost exclusively dealing with numbers? How the hell did that even happen???? I didn't take a single math-related course in post-secondary school, and I took as few in high school as I could get away with. And yet? *shakes head* 

The universe must think these ironies are actually funny. Got news for you, you cruel, heartless bitch mistress. I ain't laughin'!!

Thank goodness my home life makes up for it. If I didn't have a husband who supported me hiding in the writing cave most of the day, I'd probably have gone round the bend years ago. So, folks, this is me, having one hell of a time this week, and it's only Monday. What's up with the rest of you? Got some mini rants to share? Some Monday commiseration? Speak up! we're all about having a go at the cruel universe today.

Now that's Love!

I haven’t been around much for various reasons. One, I was horribly ill for six weeks and it has taken a good month for me to get to the point where I had enough strength to do simple things like stand at the sink and wash dishes or open a TV dinner and throw it in the microwave. I have never, ever been that sick in my entire life, period.

However, there’s more to this story. The last seven months have been hell. I’ve been dealing with changes in my husband that both frightened and baffled me. He swore it was just him being tired and needing a vacation and that he just couldn’t seem to get enough rest. I won’t get into the details, but things ranged from him being unusually argumentative and beyond grouchy to problems such as falling off the kitchen chair or not remembering important discussions. By January, he became ill around the same time I did.

He swore he had the flu or some sort of virus, but he kept working. Then Wee Man came down with Type A flu and gave it to me. I crashed like a ton of bricks and suffered through ten days of the stuff. Once I started recovering, I had about six days of feeling better, went out with my oldest dau one afternoon to have my hair cut, and the next day was struck down by a 104 temperature and the glands in my head and neck swelling up so badly I couldn’t function.

The hubby hovered over me while I had the flu. Again, he took care of me during the second round of sickness. He worried and fretted. He’d place cold cloths on my head as I burned with fever. I teased him he was going to wear a groove in the floor from his favorite kitchen chair to our bed.

Finally, after a week of major antibiotics (2,000 mil of Amoxicillin a day!), I started recovering, but after four days of meds, I woke up with an ear ache and a fever again and went back to the doctor. This time he gave me super antibiotics, and now I’m getting back to normal (whatever that is, lol).

While I was ill, the house turned into a demilitarized zone. It irked me that no one would do laundry, run the vacuum, or clean up the kitchen. Why couldn’t someone step up? Why did I have to look at that mess and be the one who inevitably cleaned it up once I got back on my feet?

Whenever I managed to get up and go get something to drink, I would stare at the kitchen counter covered in food and grease splatters, empty food boxes no one would throw away, empty bags, containers, cans, and dirty forks, spoons, knives, and other utensils…

The hubby had done the dishes while I was so sick, which is shocking because he hates dishes and will do them only when it’s a dire necessity.

“Babe, why is it you can wash the dishes but won’t clean up the counter and stove top?”

“Hey, I managed to wash the dishes. I’ll get to the other stuff eventually.”

He never did. One entire morning I wiped, scrubbed, chiseled, and cleaned the counters and stove.

But as I started feeling better, I noticed he was feeling—and looking—worse. His slurred speech late in the day grew worse, an eyelid drooped, and I noticed him stumbling around and dropping things. Worried silly, I finally convinced him to go to the doctor.

The next day he called me from the doctor’s office and said he was on his way to the hospital. I got to the ER to find out he’d had a minor stroke about six months ago and that it was so deep in the core of his brain it had taken that long for the effects of the stroke to surface i.e. the exhaustion, flu-like symptoms, stumbling, slurred speech, loss of dexterity in one hand, etc.

But my husband is a stubborn cuss, and I call him that on a regular basis. As a result of his pigheadedness, we argue a lot, but I’m stubborn too and will stand toe-to-toe with him when we do argue. In turn, he calls me Iron Ass because I won’t back down and make him walk the straight and narrow, LOL.

But a thought occurred to me…he was suffering through the effects of a stroke and took care of me. Me! How many men would do that? How many men, so sick they could barely stand let alone keep working every day, would tend to their spouse like that?

Now that’s love! That’s the type of man I want in the romance novels we write and read! He’s not a big, muscled Viking. He’s not the rich prince who falls for the peasant woman or the sheikh who rides across the dunes to sweep the maiden up onto his horse.

No, my husband is my hero. My soul mate. My friend. My companion. And he’s my entire world. I thank God for him every day, sometimes several times a day.

Then I felt bad for grouching at him about the counters and stove top, the house and its mess. He was lucky just to do what he was able, and I had snarled about the housework. I told him how I felt, and he just smiled and said, “You would’ve done the same for me, honey. We love each other.”

Hubby, Matthew, with our daughter Ivory.

He’s right.

But now as I write this, I’m happy to report that he went to his first physical therapy session yesterday and after evaluating him, he was told to go home and not come back. The Stubborn Cuss (☺) has been so determined not to let what he was suffering get the best of him that he’s recovered the effects quicker than the therapy personnel had ever seen. By the end of this summer, if not sooner (said his therapist, laughing once she found out what I call my husband) he should be totally recovered and his brain will have re-routed various functions so he will be completely normal again.

It was a wake-up call for my husband. It was also a blessing in disguise because it has given him a new perspective on life and family.

As for blessings, I am very blessed to have this man in my life as my mate. Love you, baby…always.

Batteries and Toys

Ever since Christmas, I have been replacing batteries like crazy in multiple kids’ toys and even my computer. Even with rechargeable batteries, I’m still taking out dead ones and putting in new AAs and AAAs at least every other day. It’s crazy!

Is there some kind of conspiracy with toy and battery companies to make parents spend more and more money? And most of the toys don’t even come with batteries anymore, not even the cheap trial ones.

So there we were on Christmas day, stealing batteries out of remotes (which did come with batteries – huh!), just so the kids could at least play with one new toy.

Yet when I went to the adult toy store, the toy I bought (on recommendation from another author) came already charged. Didn’t have to wait around, plug it in, or anything. Therefore, my husband and I had to get through a day of searching for and charging batteries for the kids before we could play with our own toy that came ready to use. Does that make any sense?

Toys companies should take note. With the amount of money people drop on kids’ toys, you’d think they could at least include batteries. Really!

Never Gonna Let You Go Blurb

Caught in a tangle of lies, Calla Jacobs must sort through the truth to discover where she truly belongs. A biologist for Planet Core, she finds herself ensnared in a web of deceit. Sent to Airondelle, she must work with a team to prepare the newly discovered planet for colonists from Earth. But the mission does not go as she expected. Her former lover, Erik Edwards, shuns her, sending Calla into the arms of Melina Holloway, their commander, for the attention she craves and more. A confrontation among the trio leaves her with a broken heart, and fleeing from the two people she trusted most.

Attempting to break free from the lies that bind her, she discovers Planet Core has deceived everyone. And when she returns to Earth, Calla learns just how far Planet Core’s control reaches.

Available from Decadent Publishing and other ebook retailers.
Buy Links here: http://www.markofthestars.com/wp/?page_id=7889

Book Trailer: http://youtu.be/I8hN8O4bVo4

Bio:
Jessica Subject started writing to encourage her daughter to read. Now she writes to keep herself grounded. Although she reads many genres, she enjoys writing Science Fiction Romance the most and believes everyone in the universe deserves a happily ever after. She lives Southwestern Ontario, Canada with her husband and two kids and loves to hear from anyone who has enjoyed her stories. Her debut novella, Celestial Seduction is available from Decadent Publishing.

Website/Blog: http://www.markofthestars.com
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/jsubject
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Jessica-E-Subject-author/205759796126370

Go Ahead...Eat My Leg

I’ve had a lot going on in my life lately. Nothing is good right now. But life goes on and you still have to pay the bills, right? Right.

But I am in NO mood to be screwed with either. I have what my phone company calls a “green line”. Basically, it just gives me Internet and that’s it. No actual land line (I use cell phones). It also hooks up to my satellite for TV in case I want to order a movie—which I never do. And this “green line” costs me forty bucks a month plus tax (that keeps changing from bill to bill) and some mysterious surcharge that I’ve never understood and no one can seem to explain to my satisfaction.

Anyway, a lot was going on this month. I was in a really bad place head wise (still am). And so I forgot to pay the bill until the day before the past due date. Forgot to pay my cell phone bill too. But I paid them both and thought everything was fine. Hell, I paid them last Monday.

So I’m sitting here this morning and my cell phone rings. Now how the phone company knows my cell phone number is beyond me. I sure as hell didn’t give it to them. But I hear this woman telling me this is a courtesy call. “A what?” I said.

She said, “This is a courtesy call to remind you that your bill is past due and the balance of $69.41 must be paid by 5 pm today or your service will be disconnected.”

Okay, people. I’m NO dummy. I said, “Where are you getting that figure? I just paid my bill in full last week and have the confirmation number to prove it. And it was only $48.00 and change. AND…why are you saying this is a courtesy call in one breath and threatening me in the next?”

Yeah, I tend to play with the minds of people I believe are just stupid enough to believe I am afraid of them. I continued, “There is absolutely NOTHING courteous about threatening someone, ma’am.”

Silence. She just didn’t know how to reply. After several empty seconds she says, “How do you plan to pay your bill?”

I said, “Fix the price first. And then we’ll talk payment.”

She says, “I’ll check the account, ma’am.” She does and comes back on after about three minutes and says, “There is a twenty dollar late payment fee.”

I said, “No. Remove that. I paid the day before the past due date so that doesn’t apply.” So she says, “But the payment is still pending.”

HUH? “Pending?” I said. “Yes, ma’am. It hasn’t posted to your account yet.”

So I said, “And whose fault is that? Not mine. I paid it. Cash went out of my wallet to that odd looking girl who never smiles at that little kiosk payment center in the grocery store in town.”

So, we go round and round and I end up with a supervisor. Bitch! But I’m a bigger bitch. Asked for her name and told her she’d be seeing herself on the six o’clock evening news if she did not take that twenty dollar charge off my bill. It was removed, but not without a lot of anger from me. Unnecessary anger at that. I mean, crap. I can send Sarah Masters who lives in Britain an email right now and she gets it less than a second later and these people are telling me that a payment I made a week ago is PENDING????

You’ve gotta watch out for the phone company. They will screw you for sure. Years ago when I was in the construction business, I had a big Yellow Page ad in the phone book. My phone bill was like six and seven hundred bucks for that business every single month. Lots of long distance and such. Anyway, one day I sat down and discovered where I had been double charged for my Yellow Page ad. Had BEEN double charged for almost two damn years. And instead of the phone company sending me a check for this overcharge? They credited my account. I didn’t have to pay a phone bill for well over a year they owed me so much money. But ain’t that something? They want cash and I couldn’t get cash from them.

Onto another PITA situation. My satellite bill has gone steadily up. It’s now sitting at a tad over seventy bucks a month. So I sat down, looked at the different programs and compared them. Did this on Saturday. I finally figured out that I was paying an extra fifteen bucks for all of these music and sports channels we don’t watch/listen to. So I called and asked for a different package. But oddly enough, my bill can’t be credited until next month. Again, I ask you, isn’t it funny you can send an email around the world in a nanosecond and can’t take a charge off a bill the same way?

Anyway, while I am on the phone with this satellite rep she asks if I’d like to get free HD for life. I said, “No such thing as free.” She said, “Oh yes, ma’am. This is totally free. HD will never cost you a penny.” I said, “Okay, sure. I’ll take it.”

Then she says, “Are you at the same address?” I said, “Yes, why?” She said, “So we can send the tech out to install your HD receiver.” I said, “Hold it. How much does the tech cost?” She said, “The tech service is $99.99 and the receiver is on special this month for $199.99.”

The kids rushed into the room. Why? Because they haven’t heard me laugh in a while. And it was the kind of laugh that makes you cry—know what I mean?

After I finally was able to speak again, I said, “So much for free HD!”

She said, “Ma’am the HD is free. And in another year or so, everyone is going to be charging for it. You really need to do this because everything is going HD.” I said, “Honey, I don’t care if everything goes 4-D and they do a remake of Jaws and that big damn fish swims out of the screen and eats my freaking leg I am NOT giving you $300.00!”

Guess you all know I don’t have free HD, don’t ya?

Just a day in the life of Tess. Bring it on!